Some parents believe cellphones are harmful to children, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#parents #cellphones #children

One group of people believe that the use of mobile devices is adversely affecting their kids ,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

others oppose

this

concern. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I will discuss both sides of the argument and provide my personal viewpoint regarding the positive side of

this

technology. Undoubtedly, the excessive use of cell

phones

by teenagers these days is dangerous not only for their physical health but

also

for their mental well-being. The most prominent cause is the wrong body posture

while

using

phones

and the long screen time leads to poor eyesight.

For example

, in 2022, Ophthalmologists declared that 7 out of 10 teens have weakened eyesight

due to

regular use of mobile devices. Not only

this

but children

also

suffer from mental pressure when they get involved in keeping themselves updated with trends. On the other side, there are innumerable uses of technology if used correctly.

For instance

, students under the poverty line can educate themselves by learning from the internet, YouTube is a great platform to gain knowledge.

Moreover

, kids can communicate with their parents when outside the home and navigate their ways.

Also

, some school-going children who do not have access to musical instruments or software tools , can download applications on their

phones

and practice their skill set.

Therefore

, cell

phones

help in making a child independent. In my opinion,

although

mobile

phones

are quite useful for learning new languages and skills, they should be supervised by parents and should be given only for a limited time. We can not completely restrict the new generation from using

such

technologies. In conclusion, one group of folks is worried that cell

phones

will spoil their children

while

others think the opposite.

This

essay includes both views and my personal opinion.

Submitted by manubadial on Fri Sep 22 2023

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for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

291 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some parents believe cellphones are harmful to children, while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

the maps below the centre of a small towncalled Islip as it id now,and plans for its development. semmerise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparision where relevant.

In some countries young people have less leisure time and under a lot of pressure to work hard in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

Many people today are worried about `cybercrime’ such as hacking and identity theft. What problems does `cybercrime’ cause, and what solutions can you suggest for ordinary people and businesses to take?

The table below shows the percentage of employers in various sectors having difficulty in finding staff in 2003 and 2004.