The bar chart shows the typical weekday for students in three different countriesSummarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar graph illustrates data regarding special working days for classmates in three different states. Generally speaking,
it is clear that
overall
, students spend most of their time
studying. Whereas
, they have the least amount of relaxed time
.
First off, the highest number of students sleeping on weekdays in the UK, which was 8.5. The next largest figure is learning time
, which was 8. At the same time
, the sleeping time
in Germany is the same as the
UK. Change preposition
in the
Similarly
, the digit of relaxation time
for learners in both the UK and Germany was 7. Whereas
, Germany has the maximum learning time
on weekdays, with the number 9.
On the other hand
, Japan’s studying expenses are the tallest among the typical workdays in three countries, with a figure of 13. Contrary to that, classmates have
the fewest days to loosen up, which was only 4. Wrong verb form
had
However
, the number of sleeping is slightly more than relaxing, which increase
by 3. Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
Finally
, Japan has very dramatic weekdays.Submitted by cyh000823 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words time with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!