In many countries, imprisonment is the most common solution to crime. However, some people believe that better education will be effective solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many
people
believe that the reduction of
crime
will be achieved by providing better
education
and
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
prison
sentences
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
not
necessery
Correct your spelling
necessary
. I strongly disagree with
this
notion as imprisonment plays a vital role
to make
Change preposition
in making
show examples
people
understand that breaking
law
Correct article usage
the law
show examples
have
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has
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the
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apply
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consequnces
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consequences
.
This
essay will
further
elaborate my views in
favoring
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favouring
show examples
argument
Correct article usage
the argument
show examples
.
To begin
with,
education
plays a pivotal role.
In other words
,
School
Fix the agreement mistake
Schools
show examples
can teach the law and
results
Correct article usage
the results
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of breaking the law to students.
Hence
people
develop discipline and
better
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a better
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understanding towards
rules
Correct article usage
the rules
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and regulations of
country
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the country
show examples
. Not only
this
, better
education
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
people
responsible
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for
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to
Change preposition
for
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their country and make them understand how to be
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
a
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apply
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better citizen
as well as
divert
Wrong verb form
diverts
show examples
them to do any
crime
. On the other side , imprisonment is really
cornerstone
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a cornerstone
show examples
for
wrong doers
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wrongdoers
show examples
.
Prison
Fix the agreement mistake
Prisons
show examples
have
really
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a really
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bad
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
as well
as
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and
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people
face difficulties
such
as isolation from their loved
once
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ones
show examples
and strict rules even
they
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apply
show examples
loss
Replace the word
lose
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freedom
too
Rephrase
apply
show examples
.
Therefore
this
type of
punsihment
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punishment
teach
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teaches
show examples
people
not to do any illegal activities and fear
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
any
wron
Correct your spelling
wrong
work
doing
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
.
For instance
,
people
fears
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fear
show examples
to do
Change the verb form
doing
show examples
any
unlawfull
Correct your spelling
unlawful
activity
due to
prison
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a prison
show examples
sentence.
Moreover
,
incarcernation
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incarceration
is
also
good for
people
outside prisons as they feel safe and secure from
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apply
show examples
the
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apply
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serious criminals. Murderers
for example
, if
murderers
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murderers'
murderer's
show examples
punishments are
little
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a little
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longer than others
so
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apply
show examples
citizens feel secure if criminals are in
prison
. They can walk on
streets
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the streets
show examples
without fearing anyone.
To conclude
,
definately
Correct your spelling
definitely
better
eduaction
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education
make
people
better
Add an article
the better
show examples
citizen and make them responsible
however
imprisonment is really important in many cases to punish some serious crimes. I disagree that only
education
is the solution to reduce
crime
.
Prison
sentence is equally important to eradicate the
crime
.
Submitted by bhumikashah1414 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Recidivism
  • Rehabilitation
  • Deterrent
  • Vulnerable groups
  • Social inclusion
  • Crime prevention
  • Penal system
  • Reoffending rates
  • Restorative justice
  • Societal norms
  • Economic disparity
  • Educational disparity
  • Delinquency
  • Socioeconomic factors
  • Correlation vs causation
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