Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your opinion
Health
deterioration becomes a public problem, so each individual and government think of workable ways to improve public health
. Some people hold the opinion that providing more sports
centers
or Change the spelling
centres
health
clubs is the most effective method, but I believe proper health
education would lead to more notable outcomes.
Providing more sports
facilities for the public will enhance their health
. For instance
, some free outdoor gyms spring up in parks in Hanoi – a densely populated capital of Vietnam, prompting more people to exercise regularly. Hongkong
is a similar case, where many soccer pitches, squash courts, and swimming pools have been opened free of charge to the public, so they are more interested in working out daily. They can not only burn redundant calories and build up muscle through regular exercise but Correct your spelling
Hong Kong
also
open their network which betters their mental health
.
However
, I would argue that increasing the provision of sports
amenities would have little impact on public health
. Despite the free access to sports
facilities, many still fail to boost their health
because of their laziness and no interest in sports
. Therefore
, I think that we need to impart knowledge about the importance of a healthy body to each individual. For example
, officers should be educated that the lack of physical movement is the root reason for backache, headache, obesity, or even loss of creativity and short concentration span at work, so they will be more motivated to do it regularly. It is also
better if sports
competitions are held frequently to attract them to take up sports
.
In conclusion, the installation of more sports
facilities can improve public health
, but I think this
measure is not more viable than education.Submitted by tranbaongoc231007 on
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Ensure that each paragraph ends with a strong concluding sentence that summarizes the main point of the paragraph.
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Consider using a wider range of vocabulary to avoid repetition and to demonstrate a higher level of proficiency.
grammatical range
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
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