Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting a culture. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Nowadays,
one
thing can be seen that many
heritage
sites have turned into tourist attractions.Having some debate related to the protection of the places where more
people
come has the same meaning that more destruction will appear.
In contrast
, when the cultures become well-known,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
will be
more safety
Correct word choice
safe
show examples
.
This
essay below shows both sides and gives individual about
this
problem With the first statement,
one
thing can
know
Wrong verb form
be known
show examples
clearly is anything in the world is affected by time so it needs to
maintain
Wrong verb form
be maintained
show examples
to survive, when
one
place becomes popular, it will be given more attention by
people
.
For example
, a tower was built
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many centuries ago,
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
status is
very
Add an article
a very
the very
show examples
bad bow and
predict
Wrong verb form
predicted
show examples
to destroy
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
years, it
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
prepair
Correct your spelling
repair
prepare
but if nobody
care
Change the verb form
cares
show examples
about
this
due to
the low advantages it
bringing
Wrong verb form
brings
show examples
, the culture will
dissapear
Correct your spelling
disappear
.But when it
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
merit on investors, they will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
do anything to keep that.
Moreover
, when the
heritage
become
Wrong verb form
becomes
show examples
famous, when the bad harmful
affect
Correct your spelling
effects
show examples
to
this
, some criticise come from
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
will send to
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
, it was a big pressure and they must take some actions to make it great again.
Turn
Wrong verb form
Turning
show examples
to
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
thesis,
people
will destroy the cultures.
First,
one
factor that
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is wrong when think anybody
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
the awareness, we can easily
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
see many graphic
paints
Replace the word
painted
show examples
on the wall
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everywhere, so that when
heritage
sites are opened for tourist, many harmful
action
Change to a plural noun
actions
show examples
can happen and the cultures will be lost
it's
Replace the word
its
show examples
value.
In addition
, when tourist travel to
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
places, they bring plastic
such
as glass, bowl, etc,... and throw it unwittingly, trash
apear
Correct your spelling
appears
and the building is
poluted
Correct your spelling
polluted
,in
short
Add an article
the short
a short
show examples
time it
turn
Change the verb form
turns
show examples
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
useless
Correct article usage
a useless
show examples
place and nobody want to come. In my opinion, the arts must be opened to
people
due to
the knowledge
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
bring.We can know more about how our
ancestor
Fix the agreement mistake
ancestors
show examples
live
Wrong verb form
lived
show examples
,
what
Correct word choice
and what
show examples
traditional
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
country
attend
Wrong verb form
attended
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
.But when to do that, we need the strict rule, well fine when illegal actions are taken and the culture will
brought
Change the verb form
bring
be brought
show examples
more income to
Add an article
the
show examples
location
Thus
,
heritage
should be opened to become popular rather than do not care about
this
and let it
dissapear
Correct your spelling
disappear
from the world.The things
people
need
do
Fix the infinitive
to do
show examples
is maintain
Correct your spelling
usually
ussually
Correct your spelling
usually
,protect it by
Correct your spelling
articles
articals
Correct your spelling
articles
, improve awareness
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: