Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

It is thought that

culture

Use synonyms

is the main source of

earning

Correct your spelling

earnings

show examples

for

tourism

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while

Linking Words

critics admit that

tourism

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assure

Change the verb form

assures

show examples

the

maintanance

Correct your spelling

maintenance

culture

Use synonyms

. I am more inclined toward the first view and will explain the reasons for my options in the following paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, first and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

foremost,

Use synonyms

culture

Fix the agreement mistake

cultures

show examples

which are likely to

be vanished

Change to the active voice

vanish

have vanished

show examples

are being assist

Change the verb form

are being assisted

are assisting

show examples

from

Change preposition

show examples

people

Use synonyms

all over the

countries

Fix the agreement mistake

country

show examples

These

Change the determiner

This culture

These cultures

show examples

culture

Use synonyms

will be known by

people

Use synonyms

via

Add an article

the internet

show examples

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

while

Linking Words

the middle part of

Vietnam

Change noun form

Vietnam's

show examples

agriculture

Replace the word

agricultural

show examples

culture

Use synonyms

is endangered by the flood,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

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from all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

part

Fix the agreement mistake

parts

show examples

of the

contries

Correct your spelling

countries

put all of their effort and dedication

with

Change preposition

into

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

hope

to support

Change preposition

of supporting

show examples

them.

Moreover

Linking Words

student

Add an article

a student

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in the

morden

Correct your spelling

modern

time

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

studying

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Use synonyms

culture

Add an article

the culture

show examples

at school, they

was

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were

show examples

taught to preserve and enhance them as a priceless fortune of their country town.

Consequently

Linking Words

, there are

another way

Fix the agreement mistake

other ways

show examples

to protect the

culture

Use synonyms

, but some of them will

be disappeared

Wrong verb form

disappear

show examples

without the help of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

tourism

Use synonyms

On the other hand

Linking Words

, there are a great majority of countries are persuading

tourist

Fix the agreement mistake

tourists

show examples

to experience the ethnic area.

This

Linking Words

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

to funds from

tourism

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to improve the standard of living for ethnic

people

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and bring their

countries

Change noun form

country's

countries'

show examples

beauty to the world.

Moreover

Linking Words

tourism

Use synonyms

contract

Correct subject-verb agreement

contracts

show examples

people

Use synonyms

to pay attention

Change preposition

show examples

the poverty areas to assist them.

For instance

Linking Words

, most of the

Use synonyms

tourism

Replace the word

tourist

show examples

attraction was found

nearby

Correct your spelling

near

show examples

the poverty areas or the community center that can gain tourist attention for assistance.

Therefore

Linking Words

, the

tourism

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business is in

favor

Change the spelling

favour

show examples

economic

Correct article usage

the economic

show examples

field in maintaining the

culture

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

this

Linking Words

essay discussed the reasons how

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

mitigates many

country's

Fix the agreement mistake

countries'

show examples

cultures.

Besides

Linking Words

that,

this

Linking Words

essay suggests other ways to protect the

culture

Use synonyms

. In my opinion,

culture

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can be saved by the

economy

Replace the word

economic

show examples

contribution from

tourism

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However

Linking Words

, citizen

Correct your spelling

themselves

themselve

Correct your spelling

themselves

have to step on their own feet and find a way to preserve their

culture

Use synonyms

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Sep 25, 2023

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
44
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

311 words

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Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Is it better for students to live away from home during their university studies? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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