IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Information technology enables peeople to do their work outside thier workplace (e.g. at home, when travelling, etc.). do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages?

#information #technology #peeople #work #thier #workplace #e #g #home #mobility
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
 modern era, It is undeniable that
technology
Use synonyms
 helps
people
Use synonyms
 to
work
Use synonyms
 from their homes or when they are travelling. Many
people
Use synonyms
 think that
technology
Use synonyms
 is helpful for
people
Use synonyms
 who are working outside their office. I personally agree that
people
Use synonyms
 are helped by
technology
Use synonyms
 to
work
Use synonyms
 anywhere. One of the disadvantages of advanced
technology
Use synonyms
 for
workers
Use synonyms
 is
workers
Use synonyms
 do not have
time
Use synonyms
 to spend
time
Use synonyms
 with their family at home.
This
Linking Words
 is because they use their
time
Use synonyms
 to do their job at home.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
workers
Use synonyms
 do not have quality
time
Use synonyms
. Some employees tend to spend their
time
Use synonyms
 working on their jobs in front of the computer on their off day on Sunday. Despite the drawbacks, we cannot deny that sophisticated
technology
Use synonyms
 brings benefits for
people
Use synonyms
 because they can
work
Use synonyms
 two jobs a day in different places. A great example is a housewife, she cannot attend the meeting because one of her children is sick. In
this
Linking Words
 situation, even though she is not present at the office, she is able to do her job, which she has to finish on that day. Another benefit of advanced
technology
Use synonyms
 is that
people
Use synonyms
 are able to contribute at
work
Use synonyms
, even though they are not in the office.
People
Use synonyms
 are able to
work
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 on holiday. or when they are at the airport.
For example
Linking Words
, as a programmer, he can create an application
while
Linking Words
 he is on the sea, travelling overseas. All in all. It is undeniable that every coin has two sides, in
this
Linking Words
 case is
technology
Use synonyms
. Even Though there is a negative impact on
workers
Use synonyms
' working performance, I personally believe that the benefits drawback the disadvantages.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: