Too much emphasis is placed on education. More government money should be spent on providing free-time activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is an opinion that government funding should be forwarded not only on the teaching but
also
on spare time activity purposes. Linking Words
While
knowledge is fundamental for uprising youngsters, no doubt, that free-time activities are as significant for obtaining communication soft skills. I will try to extend my view in the following paragraphs.
Long-term experience gained from the observation of the educational process implies that the provision of pure knowledge is not a sufficient contribution to fulfilling the process. Linking Words
Moreover
, sometimes the most prominent Linking Words
students
face a loss of motivation and depression Use synonyms
due to
pressure and stress caused by an enormous amount of study material. Linking Words
For example
, the research done in the late 2010s declares that the Linking Words
overall
grade decline takes place for more than half of Linking Words
students
after the initial years at institutions. Following investigations revealed that young minds are exhausted Use synonyms
due to
the repetitive lifestyle without side activities.
Linking Words
Consequently
, appeals for investing more in entertainment and other facilities seem to be justified. Nowadays, some universities and global companies implement practices that allow people to avoid overstress and escape the undesirable effect of moral depletion. Linking Words
For instance
,the University of Arizona created study free dorm with specific facilities. Linking Words
As a result
, Linking Words
students
are able to chill and communicate with peers, share concerns and assist each other with inconveniences which leads to a positive atmosphere within the university.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, claims to invest in side facilities Linking Words
such
as playgrounds and hobby centres are justified as Linking Words
this
practice encourages Linking Words
students
to focus on education. In future, all educational institutions will be supplied with similar activity centres.Use synonyms
Submitted by h.israfilov on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Ensure your essay directly addresses all parts of the task prompts. It is crucial to have a clear position throughout your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Develop your main points more fully to extend and support your arguments, including a variety of linking words to ensure clear logical progression.
task achievement
Work on presenting a balanced view, which is required by the task, by discussing both sides of the argument more explicitly before stating your own position in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Provide clear topic sentences for each paragraph to improve the structure and clarity of your points.