IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

The diagram below shows the process of producing construction broicks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows the process of producing construction broicks. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#process #construction #broicks #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The diagram depicts the
process
 of manufacturing construction
broicks
Correct your spelling
bricks
.
Overall
, it is noticeable that there are 7 main stages to
produce
Wrong verb form
producing
show examples
broicks
Correct your spelling
bricks
 which start
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
 digger and clay and end with delivery.
In addition
 , only
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 stage
require
Change the verb form
requires
show examples
mannual
Correct your spelling
manual
 work where
people
 hard
working
Verb problem
apply
show examples
,
while
 other processes can be done
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 different equipment.
To begin
with
Add a comma
,with
show examples
digger
Fix the agreement mistake
diggers
show examples
, where
people
 put a lot of effort
to find
Change preposition
into finding
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
,
therefore
 they
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
found the clay which was sent to
roller
Correct article usage
the roller
show examples
.
Subsequently
,
this
process
 will require a durable time as
people
 should
waite
Correct your spelling
wait
 to achieve a metal grid.
Moreover
, it is linked with sand and water
,
Correct word choice
and,therefore
show examples
therefore
 transported to make a wire cutter or mould. The next phase of
this
process
 is called drying when
people
 dry it
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 over
between
Change preposition
apply
show examples
48 hours.
Consequently
, it is sent to
kiin
Correct your spelling
kiln
kin
to heat
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
moderately, high and after
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 cooling chamber from 48 to 72 hours. Following that they start to package ready
broicks
Correct your spelling
bricks
. Ultimately, it
ready
Add a missing verb
is ready
show examples
 for delivery and will have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
good sales.
However
,
this
process
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 repeated again as soon as
people
 will start to identify a clay with digger.
Submitted by dimash171206 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "therefore".
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words process, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: