Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Dicuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #revenue #dicuss

In modern times, protecting

culture

has become a broad issue for the general public. A section of individuals think that

tourism

is one of the reasons why costumes will

are

Wrong verb form

show examples

misunderstood.

However

, others believe that tourist service is merely a way of developing and saving

culture

. To my mind, I absolutely agree with the latter choice. First of all, some

people

believe that a range of tourist attractions

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

traditional costumes

was

Wrong verb form

that are

show examples

always ruined because foreigners do not understand and know the reason for the local

culture

so they can not do it correctly.

For example

, one tourist learns a new thing related to anything about a new place but it is incorrect,

then

it spreads to others.

This

culture

will be ruined

athough

Correct your spelling

although

they

are not try

Change the verb form

do not try

show examples

doing it.

In other words

the

Correct article usage

show examples

minority of the public does not know that

local

Correct article usage

the local

show examples

community

Correct subject-verb agreement

does

show examples

not care how to improve and protect their traditional costume, they just pay attention to

earn

Wrong verb form

earning

show examples

tourism

revenue and

people

says

Correct subject-verb agreement

say

show examples

that

tourism

is a reason for all these problems.

As a result

, it can be seen that all the native

people

just convince tourists to buy anything they sell

instead

of protecting their costumes. In other terms

Add a comma

show examples

tourism

can help our countries to show and demonstrate our

culture

to others. If

tourism

service develops, a lot of

people

can know about

this

country and its

culture

Besides

that, the authority will renovate that cultural and historical or ancient building because of

Correct article usage

the

show examples

high rate of

people

who attend it.

For instance

, if foreigners are interested in

this

costume,

this

country will be more famous than ever and it is a good situation to develop the country and its

tourism

service. In my point of view, I agree that the only way to protect our traditions is

improving

Wrong verb form

to improve

show examples

our

tourism

. An area of

guest

Fix the agreement mistake

guests

show examples

from other

land

Fix the agreement mistake

lands

show examples

has the responsibility to respect all cultures in foreign places so we need not

scared

Add a missing verb

be scared

show examples

Change preposition

that

show examples

our

culture

will be ruined.

To sum up

culture

is a special thing that we should protect and save .

Hence

, the best way to do it correctly is to improve and develop the level of our

costume

Fix the agreement mistake

costumes

show examples

and our

tourism

Tue Sep 26 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

369 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that culture will be ruined if it is used to earn tourism revenue, but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture. Dicuss both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

In the past, people ate local food in season. Nowadays, people buy a variety of foods from all over the world. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree, what other measures do you think might be effective

Employers should give their workers at least one month’s holiday a year, as it makes them better at their job. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that using animals to test new products for human consumption should be banned in all countries. To what extent do you agree? Give clear arguments and examples to state your stance.