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Music is played in every society and culture in the world today. Some people think that music brings only benefits to individuals and societies. Others, however, think that music can have a negative influence on both. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#music #society #culture #world #people #individuals #societies #influence
There is no denying the fact that these days you can find
music
 everywhere
play
Wrong verb form
played
show examples
 in our society and other cultures in the world.
While
 it is a commonly held belief that
Correct article usage
a psitive
show examples
psitive
Correct your spelling
positive
 thing for the people and the communities as well, there is
also
 an argument that
music
 can bring only drawback impact on both.
This
 essay will analyse
this
 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
 hand, one of the biggest
upside
Change to a plural noun
upsides
show examples
 of
music
 is that you can
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
enjoy
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
 your free
time
.
In other words
,
while
 you drive to work or maybe
visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
show examples
 someone you can listen to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
music
 to forget the distance.
In addition
, we must
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
agree that
music
 is art and will increase our morality.
For instance
,
according to
 a research that I wrote on a website “
music
 can make us see the world more beautiful and see it differently ”.
On the other hand
,
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
music
 is
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 of
time
. It is
also
 possible to say that, we ought to
investe
Correct your spelling
invest
 our free
time
 to learn a new skill
such
 as drawing or reading a book.
However
, the majority of
music
 nowadays is all about sadness and that of course can
affects
Change the verb form
affect
show examples
 you
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 someway.
For example
, song of Adeel “We cannot breathe”, 70% of the words are talking about breakups and how
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the world become blue. In conclusion, there is no easy answer to
this
 question. On balance,
however
. I tend to believe
that is
 better to
focuse
Correct your spelling
focus
 on our
selfs
Correct your spelling
selves
show examples
 and
get
Verb problem
take
show examples
 care of
it
Correct pronoun usage
ourselves
show examples
 we should take
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
 of our free
time
 to do something that help us in the future
instead
 of listening to
music
.
Submitted by firasalfadda2 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Harmony
  • Melody
  • Rhythm
  • Socio-cultural
  • Artistic expression
  • Cognitive development
  • Soundtrack
  • Moral implications
  • Acoustic ecology
  • Intellectual property
  • Authenticity
  • Commercialization
  • Media literacy
  • Sensory overload
  • Acculturation
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