Some people think it is better for children to have many short holidays during the year. Others believe that it would be beneficial to have fewer, longer vocations. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #children #holidays #year #vocations

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Nowadays, a group of people argue that children should have several short vacations to enhance their educational level. Meanwhile, others believe that these holidays should be fewer for the same purpose.

This

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essay will discuss both of these points of view and argue in favour of the former. On the one hand, it is evident that the current educational curriculum is becoming more difficult and heavier;

accordingly

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, today's students suffer from having less space to grow their skills and live their childhood.

Therefore

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, from a mental and psychological perspective, these children should have enough time to improve their abilities through more friction with their surroundings, in order to have a mentally stable generation who are able to adapt and solve the current world's problems.

On the other hand

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, other folks raise the flag of having fewer vacations.

Although

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they may have a point of view,

this

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decision's repercussions will not be as good as expected.

For instance

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, the famous football player "Mohamed Salah", mentioned in one of his meetings that, he had to quit school for some space to follow his dream of playing football

Remove the comma

apply

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because he had no time to do both simultaneously;

consequently

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, he was at risk of being uneducated

due to

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his decision, meanwhile, he could avoid

this

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if he had enough time.

To conclude

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, today's world puts a huge pressure on children, but I firmly believe that any society needs more stable persons rather than well-educated, but psychologically complicated people.

Hence

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, I support the decision of more vacations and more activities rather than studying only.

Submitted by rehameldweik on Fri Sep 29 2023

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Fully explain your ideas

The precentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss the causes and effects of this disturbing trend.

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples.

the chart below shoes yje changes that took place in three different areas of crime in newport city center from 2003 to 2012

In some parts of world , it’s becoming increasingly popular to try to find out the history of their own family, why do you think people do this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?