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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories
#value #country #exports #categories
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The following chart illustrates the
money
Use synonyms
 earned in 5 types of categories between the
years
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 2015 and 2016.
In addition
Linking Words
, the table below presents the percentage that varies in the same categories as above, during the same
years
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, most of the products saw an increase in export during 2016, with petroleum products
that had
Wrong verb form
having
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 the highest amount of
money
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 earnings, except gems and jewellery which had a degradation in value
oh
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of
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money
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.
According to
Linking Words
 the bar chart, the highest earning exports for both
years
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 were petroleum with approximately 63
billion
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 dollars during 2016 with an increase of 3% corresponding to
last
Linking Words
 year's export earnings, followed by engineered goods, where they reached approximately 62
billion
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 in 2016,
while
Linking Words
 during 2015 were spotted 57
billion
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 of
money
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, 8.5% growth in values.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, gems and jewellery had a depletion of 5.18%, over the
years
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, reaching about 40
billion
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 dollars in 2016.
While
Linking Words
 agricultural goods had a slight growth of less than 1%, reaching just above 30
billion
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 in 2016. As considered with textiles, there
were
Change the verb form
was
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 an upward trend of about 15%, which had reached 31
billion
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 dollars, having the largest increase of all.
Submitted by nikoletta.louka on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words money, years, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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