Some children spend a long time each day on their smartphones. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

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Some juveniles spend most of their

time

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on smartphones.

This

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is because they find streaming

videos

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engrossing, but

this

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can have negative consequences because they can distract

children

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from family life. Minors love

spend

Add the particle

to spend

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most of their

time

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on mobile devices because streaming services have many entertaining

videos

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This

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means they have endless opportunities to entertain themselves and spend their entire day consuming new shows without thinking.

For example

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, many

videos

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on Netflix are aimed at

children

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, some of which designed their titles and thumbnails to entice

children

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to click on one more video.

As a result

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, they spend their free

time

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in front of a screen

instead

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of participating in physically involved games

such

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apply

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basketball and cricket. Despite them being heavily enjoyed by

children

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this

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essay believes they should be viewed negatively because of the impact it has on

time

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with parents and siblings. Being around one’s nuclear family teaches

children

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many important things,

such

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as social values, manners and how to treat others. If a child misses these opportunities, they could grow up to have impaired social skills and take their values from YouTubers rather than parents.

For instance

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, one of the most popular personalities on YouTube is Andrew Tate, who is well known for being arrogant and having unethical interviews that are highly appreciated by audiences. In conclusion,

videos

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on mobiles may be irresistible to those under 18.

However

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, parents should restrict screen

time

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as much as possible to limit the harmful effect influencers can have on their son’s or daughter’s upbringing.

itzgurpreetsingh1Mon Oct 02 2023

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task achievement

Further develop and support the main points.

coherence cohesion

Improve logical structure and coherence.

lexical resource

Use more varied and precise vocabulary.

grammatical range accuracy

Pay attention to grammar accuracy.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Some children spend a long time each day on their smartphones. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative development?

Your opinion

The government should sometimes infringe on people’s freedom for the security of society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

The involvement of youth in crime is increasing rapidly in most cities around the world. What are reasons for this, and what are the effects?

Some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime.

Some people believe that using modern technology (digital photographs, blogs) is the best way to record and remember important personal events. Others think traditional methods (making photo albums, writing diaries) are better. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?