Many people choose to work or live abroad be cause of the higher standards of living they can find outside their home country. Do you think this brings more advantages or disadvantages to the people who follow this path?
In the contemporary era, many are migrating to foreign countries whether for the purpose of finding a job
,
or having a Remove the comma
apply
high quality
life.
Add a hyphen
high-quality
Although
many are of the opinion that this
will bring many negative ramifications,I strongly believe that this
subject has more benefits than drawbacks. To illustrate this
perspective some factors such
as job opportunities, higher
incomes Correct word choice
and higher
along with
some minor disadvantages will be analyzed .
To begin
with
immigrants tend to face a wide range of opportunities when they move to a new country , Add a comma
,with
for
instance
an advanced country like Add the comma(s)
,instance
canada
is now considered Change the capitalization
Canada
as
a popular destination for many individuals . Change preposition
apply
This
country has provided a sponsorship program for every jobseeker wether
foreign or local so that they would be hired for an occupation as soon as possible . Correct your spelling
whether
Furthermore
working in such
developed nations can be a great boost for people to pursue a professional career . As a result
not only will they have a higher salary but also
their skills and ability in a particular position will be enhanced which can have a direct effect on their career prospect.
However
, living overseas will bring up a negative aspect for some individuals and that is
the sense of loneliness .Once you get faraway
from your homeland a feeling of isolation and homesickness will possess your mind. A worthy example would be the recent study that has been done by American researchers. Correct your spelling
far away
In the
results of Change preposition
The
this
specific research , it
is vividly shown that an Correct pronoun usage
apply
estimation of
60% of immigrants tend to suffer from mental conditions Replace the word
estimated
due to
the feeling of separation from their loved ones.thus
it is crucial for people to pay attention to the symptoms of Capitalize word
Thus
this
condition when settling abroad .
To sum up
when a person moves overseas the chances of a more successful future will increased
. mainly because of the business possibilities and the descent wage which is followed by it.As Change the verb form
increase
be increased
this
eseay
has shown, migrating to foreign countries will undoubtedly increase within the upcoming years.Correct your spelling
essay
Submitted by kimiaradfahim on
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task achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction to guide your essay.
task achievement
Expand on the disadvantages of living abroad and provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure to include a conclusion paragraph that summarizes your main points and restates your position.
grammatical range and accuracy
Use more varied sentence structures and avoid repetitive language.
lexical resource
Use more precise vocabulary and avoid general statements.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?