It is suggested that all young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work helping people in the community. Does it bring more benefits or drawbacks to the people

Voluntary
work
is a great practice which is done for the development of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society without getting paid. Some people believe that
this
helps youngsters
while
other
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others
show examples
give
contrast
Wrong verb form
contrasting
show examples
opinion
Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
show examples
. In
this
essay, I would like to examine the advantages and
the
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apply
show examples
disadvantages of doing social
work
.
To begin
with, doing free
work
for society enables youth to grow and sharpen their soft skills,
for instance
, leadership, communication,
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
show examples
work
etc. These will help them in their future career when they will tend to land a job or
doing
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do
show examples
other businesses.
Besides
, capitalizing
these
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on these
show examples
skills, they might get a scholarship in top national or international colleges or universities as well.
Furthermore
,
by
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apply
show examples
helping people without financial
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
also
develop
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develops
show examples
social bonding and the feeling of togetherness. These things are important since in the modern era, people are getting disconnected and isolated which
increase
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increases
show examples
loneliness, depression and
overall
imbalance of
psychic
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the psychic
show examples
mind. So, these shared feelings can be a remedy to outweigh the mental health issues and save the young generation from
the
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apply
show examples
destructive psychological problems. In spite of having numerous positive features of
this
kind
work
Change preposition
of work
show examples
, it
also
has negative sides and one of them is the
time
consumption. As
this
type of
work
does not bring any financial benefit, consumes a lot of
time
, It seems
time wasting
Add a hyphen
time-wasting
show examples
to some extent. In
this
fast moving
Add a hyphen
fast-moving
show examples
and very competitive world,
this
can be an unfruitful decision for them.
However
, voluntary
work
is a great practice, as it helps
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society in many ways and
in addition
to
this
, it helps the doers to develop their working capacity as well. Though it has
a
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apply
show examples
plenty of helpful characteristics, It has
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
side like
time
consumption as well. So, to make it as a helpful to all, we should consider both ways and plan our activities
accordingly
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the question and presents both benefits and drawbacks effectively. However, try to include more specific examples to enhance the depth of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are clearly presented and developed. You also provide a logical structure to your essay with effective paragraphing. To improve, try to create smoother transitions between some points to enhance the overall flow.
general
Ensure consistency in your tone and style. Some sentences can be more concise to avoid repetition.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the main ideas presented.
coherence cohesion
You have logically structured your paragraphs, making the essay easy to follow.
task achievement
You offer a balanced view by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • skill development
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • communication
  • leadership
  • social responsibility
  • community engagement
  • empathy
  • civic duty
  • networking opportunities
  • volunteering
  • personal growth
  • confidence
  • financial compensation
  • economic drawbacks
  • exploitation
  • free labor
  • fair exchange
What to do next:
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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