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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Students in schools and universities learn more from their teachers than through other means such as the Internet, libraries and TV.wjat extent you agree or disagree?

In the modern era,children are taught more by their teachers at colleges and universities than
other
Change preposition
by other
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 learning methods
such
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 as the
Internet
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,
books
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 ,and mass media. In my opinion ,I completely disagree with
this
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 statement because
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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cyberspace and other media provide a significant amount of updates and new information to the learners, and they have
vast
Add an article
a vast
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 amount of access to obtain
knowledge
Use synonyms
.
Hence
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, in
this
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essay
Add a comma
,essay
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 I will explore why I disagree with
this
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 view. First of all , since the
Internet
Use synonyms
,
books
Use synonyms
 and television offer a lot of new details and updates to the learners, they are able to gain more
knowledge
Use synonyms
 from those sources than
their
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from their
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 lectures at educational institutions.As
school
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 tutors have a limited awareness about their
school
Use synonyms
 curriculum, they do not provide
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about sophisticated innovations in the world.
Therefore
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, schoolchildren are able to
educate
Verb problem
gain
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 a significant amount of
knowledge
Use synonyms
 about
cutting-edge
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the cutting-edge
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 world by surfing data through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cyberspace and social platforms as well
by
Correct word choice
as by
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 reading valuable
books
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.
For example
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, at present, most
of
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apply
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learners are well educated even though they do not attend
to
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apply
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educational institutions because nowadays most
of
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apply
show examples
adolescents have been discovering modern technology and other things by searching
from
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for
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 other learning materials .
Consequently
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 ,they are able to keep abreast with
the
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apply
show examples
modern technology and the world effectively.
Secondly
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,
as
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apply
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having
many
Correct word choice
apply
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access to
obtain
Verb problem
apply
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knowledge
Use synonyms
 from these sources ,studying academics
have been
Wrong verb form
has
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 become extremely easy and effective
fro
Correct your spelling
for
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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schoolchildren. At present, most pupils
have
Verb problem
are
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 addicted to surfing the
Internet
Use synonyms
 and watching TV.
As a result
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, since these sources provide a thousand
of
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apply
show examples
programmes and opportunities which are significant to adolescents' academics, they play a crucial role
to improve
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in improving
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 their
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
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 significantly.
For instance
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, during Corona pandemic, a
multitudes
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multitude
show examples
 of students
learn
Wrong verb form
learned
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 their
school
Use synonyms
 lessons through online classes ,TV programmes and by reading
books
Use synonyms
 as they were unable to go to
school
Use synonyms
 or universities to attend their
school
Use synonyms
 lectures.
As a consequence
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, in the future, teachers will become obsolete and other learning methods will become prominent considerably. In conclusion, children learn their
school
Use synonyms
 subjects from their
school
Use synonyms
 lecturers in spite of using other ways
such
Linking Words
 as the
Internet
Use synonyms
, libraries and televisions .
However
Linking Words
, I would argue that other learning materials are indispensable
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of
education
Add an article
the education
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 system since they provide a lot of information about new innovations and those ways offer
thousand
Fix the agreement mistake
thousands
show examples
 of access to enhance their education.

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task achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction. Your opinion is stated, but it could be more clearly articulated.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows a logical progression of ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use more varied and precise language.
grammatical range accuracy
Review your grammar and sentence structures for accuracy.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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