Science is beneficial for society, so science students should get more support. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Scientists
work
and study every day to discover things to help society. It is logical that doctorate and post-doctorate
students
have more support to continue researching. I completely agree with
this
statement because a lot of science
students
do not have benefits
such
as health insurance and they
work
overtime even weekends for lower salaries. Many doctorate
students
have finished their careers and must start to
work
in laboratories with zero experience.
In addition
, many mentors take advantage of
this
situation so, they do not give them benefits like health insurance and holidays. Even though, they do not have every necessary to research
thus
, is frustrating for them. In Argentina, there is a public institution that pays doctorate and
post-doctorate’s
Correct your spelling
post-doctorates
postdoctorate’s
salaries, and
that is
all. They do not have any other benefits because they are considered
students
. Once future scientist starts to
work
many tutors explode making them
work
long hours even on weekends, just to benefit their projects.
Students
cannot complain because they could lose their fellowships,
furthermore
, it is so hard to enter the system again if they are fired.
This
is unfair because student scientists
work
very hard to find solutions to society’s problems. During the pandemic of Covid,
students
and senior researchers worked together to discover the
caused
Verb problem
apply
show examples
agent that
produced
Verb problem
caused
show examples
a lot of deaths,
however
,
students
did not receive enough recognition for their
work
. In conclusion, science
students
are researching day by day to solve many of society’s problems,
hence
, it should be fair that they receive more recognition for their activities and more economic and psychological support from their mentors. Scientists are very important in our society.
Submitted by daniruspi on

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coherence cohesion
To strengthen the logical structure, consider making clearer connections between your main points. For instance, directly linking each supporting idea back to your thesis statement could help. You may also benefit from outlining your essay briefly before writing to ensure a smooth flow of ideas.
task achievement
Clarify and expand upon your examples where possible. Explaining how the specifics of the situation you are describing connect to your larger argument would make your examples more compelling and relevant.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion effectively present and wrap up your argument, contributing to a clear and focused overarching structure.
task achievement
Your essay provides a complete response to the prompt, addressing the need for more support for science students and providing reasons and examples.
task achievement
You have clearly articulated your ideas, making strong points about the hardships science students face and why they deserve more support.

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