Modern children are suffering from diseases that were once considered only meant for adults. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes, and what solutions can be offered?

#children #diseases #adults #obesity #disease

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this

Linking Words

time,

children

Use synonyms

are suffering from diseases that used to be adult illnesses. One of the most

diseases

Correct word choice

common diseases

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obesity

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which

attacks

Verb problem

affects

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children

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. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will explain more about the causes and the solutions to

this

Linking Words

problem.

Firstly

Linking Words

children

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are

Unnecessary verb

apply

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like to eat more ultra-processed

foods

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. It includes junk food that

have

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has

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been growing in recent years and

easy

Add a missing verb

is easy

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to find. Most

children

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like to consume ultra-processed

foods

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because of

its

Correct pronoun usage

their

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taste and simplicity. The lack of knowledge about

this

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effect on

health

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issues

also

Linking Words

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

them consume it daily.

Moreover

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this

Linking Words

condition causes an unhealthy lifestyle and

affect

Correct subject-verb agreement

affects

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their

health

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into

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show examples

obesity

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For instance

Linking Words

, a survey by

World

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the World

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Health

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Organization shows that 65% of

people with

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people's

show examples

obesity

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are

Correct subject-verb agreement

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caused by the consumption of ultra-processed

foods

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However

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, there are several solutions we can adopt to prevent

obesity

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children

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. First of all, parents should make rules about what their child consume

such

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as the limitation to

eat

Wrong verb form

eating

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junk food or other ultra-processed

foods

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. Parents can

also

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educate their

children

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to eat healthy food and make

this

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

habit in their daily life

hence

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it can lead to a healthy lifestyle.

Furthermore

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, with support from parents,

children

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will be happier to take

this

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action. In conclusion,

health

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problems especially

obesity

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has

Wrong verb form

have had

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a big impact

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show examples

children

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’s

life

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lives

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recently and even in the future.

It’s not only affect

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It does not only affect

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health

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issues but

also

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other aspects of life.

Nevertheless

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, if people can take action to prevent

this

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problem, they still have a chance to reduce

obesity

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among

children

Use synonyms

Submitted by hafizahnazir on Tue Oct 03 2023

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coherence cohesion

Provide more specific examples to support your main points.

task achievement

Expand on the solutions and their feasibility.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

257 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Obesity
Sedentary lifestyle
Prevalent
Genetic predisposition
Comfort eating
Screen time
Physical education
Nutritional education
Economic disparities
Food deserts
Subsidize
Advertising
Weight management
Junk food
Healthy food options
Physical activity
Body image
Counseling
Consumer education

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Modern children are suffering from diseases that were once considered only meant for adults. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes, and what solutions can be offered?

Your opinion

You would like to rent a car for a holiday. Write to the car rental agency. In your letter • Explain what type of car you would like • Give details of when you would like the car • Request more information about the cost

Scientific developments in farming always bring major benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Plastic products are bad for environment? Tell me the cause and solution?

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to be become a good sportsperson or musician. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.