With divorce rates and family breakdowns increasing globally, it is generally accepted that families today are not as close as they used to be. Discuss the causes of this problem and offer some possible solutions to it.

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Owing to the globally increasing divorce rates and family breakdowns, it is undeniable that families nowadays are getting fewer close-knit relationships. In
this
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essay, I will explore the reasons beneath and put some solutions to these current issues.
To begin
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with, a divided family can be caused by several reasons, mainly coming from conflicts and arguments between members. As a person’s lifestyle is incompatible with others,
this
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brings a wider gap in kin, potentially leading to confrontation and even spoilt affection.
Furthermore
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, despite having the same ideas and characteristics, under certain circumstances like financial difficulties, people have no choice but to leave their nearest and dearest to shake off the feeling of suffering, alongside frustration and sadness.
For instance
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, fed up with living with a father who is intrinsically a freeliver making a large amount of debt is more than of enough.
Consequently
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, the children must distance themselves from him to escape
this
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misery, to avoid poverty and to find peace after a restless day thinking of money problems.
In addition
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, there are still affordable approaches to tackle family issues, fortunately. First and foremost, you should not go through
this
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alone,
instead
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, share your stories with someone reliable to get the best advice. Sympathizing for family members is
also
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important. If that person still has opportunities to change, it is appropriate to empathy his situation, making every effort within an individual power to make him redeem himself and live with kindness.
However
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, when your kin reach a point of no return, allow yourself to grieve the loss of the relationship. The pain of grief is precisely what helps you let go of the old relationship and move on. And no matter how strong your grief, it won’t
last
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forever. In conclusion, family separation continues to become a heated matter for consideration. In accordance with contention, everyone should prioritize love toward their members, to give them the chance;
otherwise
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, accepting divorce and taking care of yourself for healing.

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language
Some of the vocabulary is a bit advanced and may lead to confusion when simple ideas are more appropriate (e.g., 'freeliver'). Aim for clarity over complexity.
coherence
Some sentences are lengthy and could be broken down to improve clarity and readability.
task response
Develop examples more fully to illustrate points more concretely, which would strengthen the argument.
structure
The essay has a strong introduction and conclusion that ties together the main points effectively.
task response
Main ideas are well supported and relevant to the topic.
coherence
The logical flow of the essay is mostly consistent, which facilitates understanding.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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