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Band 3

some people say that holding sports competitions can cause problems for host countries.Others disagress

#people #sports #competitions #host #countries #disagress
Sports activities are extremely important for the countries. Many people prefer to join competitive activities in order to
fun
Add a missing verb
have fun
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 and watch.
On the other hand
, if some countries
hosting
Wrong verb form
host
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 some football, basketball or tennis
tournement
Correct your spelling
tournament
 a lot of people can come as a tourist.
Moreover
, they can contribute
their
Change preposition
to their
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economi
Correct your spelling
economy
economic
. That's why
this
 topic is very important for
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
.
Besides
 that, a lot of people
against
Add a missing verb
are against
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this
 argument. Because, if
government
Correct article usage
the government
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be host
Wrong verb form
hosts
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for
Change preposition
apply
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the competition, they need to spend a lot of money.
For instance
, if they hosting for the
tournement
Correct your spelling
tournament
, they have to build new stadiums or hotels. It will be very heavy for the country. In
additionaly
Correct your spelling
addition
, government will spend time and money and they should pay big insurance for the employers.
Furthermore
, they may struggle
Change preposition
with another
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another problems
Replace the adjective
another problem
other problems
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.
Consequently
, these two arguments can provide advantages and disadvantages. Big
tournements
Correct your spelling
tournaments
 can give income
for
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to
show examples
 the country.
However
, at the same
time
Add a comma
,time
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 it might be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
show examples
 the
countries
Change noun form
country's
show examples
 economy.
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coherence cohesion
Expand on the reasons why sports activities are important for countries.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical structure and organization of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Include a clear introduction and conclusion to your essay.
lexical resource
Use more advanced vocabulary to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar errors.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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