Some people believe that once a person becomes a criminal, he will always be a criminal. Do you agree with this statement? Provide specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

It is often argued that a criminal will remain a lawbreaker for the rest of his life. I am inclined to stand with the
skeptics
Change the spelling
sceptics
show examples
. From my perspective, it is a very controversial issue that deserves an in-depth discussion. On the one hand, most
criminals
decide to commit a
crime
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
because of their mental problems, financial crises and personal issues. If the government can reduce poverty and inequality issues to address the root causes of
crime
can be a method to stop the potential
criminals
.
For instance
, Norway created more jobs and gave guidance in training and study for
criminals
in 2019, it reduced over 66% of recidivism rate in 2022.
Moreover
, if prison can provide vocational training to help
criminals
become useful members of society, it can
also
help them to reduce the pressure after they leave prison and easier to integrate into society.
On the other hand
, others argue that
crime
policy and government attitude is the main reason that
affect
Change the verb form
affects
show examples
the
crime
rate. If the punishment cannot deter potential
criminals
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
offenders are likely to re-offend if it is not harsh enough.
According to
the latest report by the Ministry of the Interior in Taiwan, after reinforcing the law in 2018, over 45% of the second
offense
Change the spelling
offence
show examples
rate had been reduced in 2023. These indicate that government and policy indeed
bring
Verb problem
have
show examples
some effects
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the criminal. In my view, the reason for a person to choose to become a criminal can be affected by many aspects, nobody will take the risk of losing their right or freedom if they have a prosperous life. Every coin has two sides, and
that is
the reason I do not agree with the statement.
Submitted by 21280370.mao on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essay Structure
Task Response: The essay provides a balanced view on the issue and offers examples to support the opinion. However, some ideas are not fully developed, and there are minor issues with task achievement.
Essay Structure
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure is generally clear, but there are areas where the development of ideas could be improved. Additionally, some transitions could be used to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: