IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart shows requests for information at a tourists office in the United Kingdom from January to June

The chart shows requests for information at a tourists office in the United Kingdom from January to June
#requests #information #tourists #office #kingdom #january #june
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The chart illustrates
requests
Use synonyms
 for
data
Use synonyms
 at a tourist
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 in the UK between
January
Use synonyms
 to June.
Overall
Linking Words
, the applications for information in
person
Use synonyms
 and by telephone
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 a dramatic rise in a
6 months
Correct your spelling
6-month
period
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
 applications for
data
Use synonyms
 by letter/email decreased slightly over the
period
Use synonyms
 of time. It can be clearly seen that
requests
Use synonyms
 in
person
Use synonyms
 started at 400 pieces
requests
Use synonyms
 in
January
Use synonyms
 and it has rocketed to 1900
requests
Use synonyms
 in June exceeding all other types of
requests
Use synonyms
. At the same time applications by telephone began at 900 in
January
Use synonyms
 and witnessed a significant increase over 6 months finishing at 1600 in June. Regarding the
requests
Use synonyms
 by letter/
email
Add a comma
,email
show examples
 it was higher than
requests
Use synonyms
 for
data
Use synonyms
 in
person
Use synonyms
 in
January
Use synonyms
, at 790 and the number halved during the
period
Use synonyms
 ending at 395 In conclusion, two types of
requests
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as in
person
Use synonyms
 and by telephone for the
data
Use synonyms
 have been going up for a given time
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
period
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
,
request
Fix the agreement mistake
requests
show examples
 by letter/email slowly went down till May, after that it
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
settled the level off in 2 months
Submitted by Abdu.abetayev on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words requests, data, january, person, period with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 4 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: