Some people think that animals should be treated as friends. Yet, others only consider animals as sources of food and clothing. What is your opinion?

#people #animals #friends #sources #food

Present day some people believe that

animals

are treated as friends when others feed their

animals

for meat or skins.In

this

,essay I will explain why

this

creature should treat like a fellow . Arguably, society thinks that the best way to treat

animals

is for food

this day

Fix the agreement mistake

these days

show examples

thus

humanity needs more food resources than friends as our community grows more and more and our opportunities

Add a missing verb

are

show examples

raised year by year,

furthermore

we must bring more meals for our family than past. Because our culture has been nearly 6 billion but now our public of the world reached to near 8 billion it is high degrees. Forks should bring not only nourishment but

also

they

are need

Change the verb form

need

show examples

to wear something in chilly weather.

This

is a huge reason why we need to hunt

animals

in lieu of treating friends.As soon as we treat buddy creatures it can be an influence to decrease the population of the world. On another hand treating creatures like a friend

for example

dogs

or cats there are can be beneficial for blindness or infants. I believe that

this

dog has so many advantages.

Firstly

dogs

are used on many different occasions

for example

dogs

are used to uncover something near borders with the military and blinds are used

dogs

Change preposition

by dogs

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

find their way or for walking a whole area. If blinds get

dogs

walking

Wrong verb form

walk

show examples

there

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

can be

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a secure zone as

dogs

protect their seniors when robbers

as well as

bullies try to do something with their owners.

According to

cats that type of fauna is used in medical practice. Because as long as we play with cats on

this

occasion our stress level will decrease. In a nutshell, I strongly believe that treating some

fauna's

Change noun form

fauna

show examples

similar to fellow is a great way to save the safety blindness

Correct your spelling

show examples

our borders .

Submitted by @ur_davrik on Thu Oct 05 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

309 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that animals should be treated as friends. Yet, others only consider animals as sources of food and clothing. What is your opinion?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Nowadays, more and more people move to live in big cities. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In some countries, more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer, rather than playing sports or exercise class. What are the reasons for this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Some people view teenage conflict with their parents as a necessary part of growing up, whilst others see it as something negative which should be avoided. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think eating meat is bad for health. Do you agree or disagree?

Stress related illnesses are becoming increasingly common What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggests?