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Band 4

some people belive that professionals such as doctors and engineers , should be required to work in the country where they did their training . others belive they should be free to work in another country if they wish. discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #belive #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
Nowadays, the
dabate
Correct your spelling
debate
 relating to whether some specific
professions
 like doctors and engineers should be required to
work
 at the
place
 where they get trained or it is their
freedom
 to choose the working
place
 arouses many
people
's attention. Some believe that those
professions
 are the most significant area and contain a lot of national secrets
while
 others hold that it is personal willingness to
work
 out or not. In my own point of view, I hold that
people
 should have
their
Change the word
the
show examples
freedom
 to
select
Verb problem
choose
show examples
 whether
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
 out or not in every
professions
Change to a singular noun
profession
show examples
. Choosing a
place
 to
work
 is likely to be the basic
freedom
 for
people
. If
losing
Wrong verb form
you lose
show examples
 that,
then
 there is totally no
freedom
 at all. It is unfair to request
specfic
Correct your spelling
specific
professions
Replace the word
professionals
show examples
 like doctors and engineers to
work
 at the
place
 where they did the
traning
Correct your spelling
training
.
For example
, nowadays, it is quite normal to see international
students
 learning subjects like
medicine
 or engineering. Requesting them to
work
 in a foreign country
where
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 is quite far from their home is unreasonable and cruel. It is highly possible that those foreign
students
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
 not adjust totally different environment and failed to meet the company's
expectation
Fix the agreement mistake
expectations
show examples
 which made a huge loss for the company. Even more, the strong request
such
 as forbidding the foreigners to go back home will possibly arouse the
workers
Change to a genitive case
worker's
workers'
show examples
 negative attitudes towards the company and the industry, arranging boycotts or
strkes
Correct your spelling
strikes
strokes
 which made
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
further interruptions
a further interruption
show examples
further
 interruptions for the whole industry.
Hence
, it is wise to give the
students
freedom
Add an article
the freedom
show examples
 to choose
whereever
Correct your spelling
wherever
 they wish to go. Admittedly, there is some underlying logic behind requesting
students
 to stay where they
learnt
Replace the word
learned
show examples
 the specific knowledge. One of the crucial reasons is to protect the national secrets.
For instance
, the newly discovered
medicine
 only be known is the medical
institute
Fix the agreement mistake
institutes
show examples
, and the government required them to keep it
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a secret. In terms of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
privacy, the staff should stay
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
where the institute is.
Furthermore
, learning
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
certain subjects
such
 as medical treatment is only suitable
to
Change preposition
for working
show examples
work
 at the
place
they
Rephrase
where they
show examples
 get trained. Different areas have different preferences and circumstances which need
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local research and training.
Like in
Change preposition
In
show examples
 China, traditional Chinese
medicine
 like eating
certain
Add an article
a certain
show examples
combination
Fix the agreement mistake
combinations
show examples
 of herbs are always been used when you have a fever or cold,
however
, western
medicine
 will never use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
herbs to treat fever.
Hence
,
although
 requesting
students
 to
work
 at the
place
they
Rephrase
where they
show examples
 get trained
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 sense in the point of protecting national resources, the
freedom
 of
choose
Replace the word
choice
show examples
weights
Correct your spelling
weighs
show examples
 far more than protecting secrets. In my perspective,
people
 should not be restricted by their own preferences
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 choosing
working
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
places.
Submitted by smyzw8 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • country
  • maintain
  • high standard
  • quality
  • professional services
  • local population
  • access
  • well-trained
  • contribute
  • development
  • progress
  • obligation
  • give back
  • society
  • invested
  • education
  • promote
  • national identity
  • pride
  • free
  • another country
  • wish
  • global exchange
  • knowledge
  • skills
  • facilitate
  • collaboration
  • innovation
  • opportunities
  • experiences
  • international mobility
  • enhances
  • growth
  • host country
  • choice
  • encourage
  • return
  • period of time
  • balance
  • individual freedom
  • needs
  • home country
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