IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

the provided bar chart illustrates how many people drank coffee and bought tea as well as their drinking habits in five Australian towns.

the provided bar chart illustrates how many people drank coffee and bought tea as well as their drinking habits in five Australian towns.
The bar graph illustrates how many
people
Use synonyms
 purchased
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea
as well as
Linking Words
 visited
coffee
Use synonyms
 shops to drink them in five Australian
cities
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, Melbourne had the highest consumption of
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea by
people
Use synonyms
 who visited directly to the shop. Brisbane had the lowest preference for purchasing fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 in a month.
To begin
Linking Words
, Melbourne was positioned in first place for
coffee
Use synonyms
 and tea in cafes at 64%, followed by Hobart way around at 62%. Sydney consumed approximately 60% remaining under 55%. Some
people
Use synonyms
 preferred to buy instant
coffee
Use synonyms
, followed by Brisbane with over 53%. The other three
cities
Use synonyms
 were under 50%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when looking at the fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 bought by Sydney at 44% which was higher than Melbourne at 42%. Hobart City
people
Use synonyms
 were purchased for 38%.
In addition
Linking Words
, the rest of the
cities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as Brisbane and Adelaide were bought over at 50%, which increased the remaining
cities
Use synonyms
 in the
last
Linking Words
 four weeks of the period.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, coffee, cities with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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