In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays unhealthy
lifestyle
and obesity have contributed to a significant growth in Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
children
population. Some people assert, that the government must be involved in getting rid of Correct article usage
the children
this
problem. From my personal standpoint, I maintain divergent
view on Correct article usage
a divergent
this
concept, perceiving that there are other factors which are responsible for spread
of diseases among Add an article
the spread
young
generation as unhealthy Add an article
the young
life manner
and lack of physical activities.
Correct your spelling
lifestyles
To begin
with, today the government has been providing numerous numbers of sport
facilities, programs, Change the noun form
sports
Correct word choice
and centers
centers
to engage in physical activities and adhere Change the spelling
centres
Change preposition
to sport
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
regiments
. Correct your spelling
regimens
However
sedentary lifestyle of parents commonly observed in work environments and homes is one of the compelling reason
why children are gaining weight significantly. Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
For example
, if the family member does not want to immerse
in exercises in quality time, it is undeniable, that children Wrong verb form
be immersed
also
will not perceive importance
of Add an article
the importance
healthy
lifestyle. Correct article usage
a healthy
Thus
, this
mindset leads to foster
the development of dangerous Verb problem
apply
weight gaining
factors and unhealthy habits.
Add a hyphen
weight-gaining
In addition
, the emergence of various types of food products at marketplaces has altered young people’s attitudes towards living healthily. It is imperative to take into child’s
mindset the quality of the food that they consume on a regular basis. Fix the agreement mistake
children’s
This
phenomenon can be elucidated by observation
that parents who engage kids in balanced Add an article
the observation
either
adequate diets consisting of vitamins, nutrients, Correct word choice
or
minerals
are more likely to stay fit with optimal functioning of Correct word choice
and minerals
metabolic
system, Add an article
the metabolic
whereas
high-colorie
food leads to the development of numerous ailments and ultimately result in weight increase. Correct your spelling
high-calorie
For instance
, when the child prefer
to have lunch with fried chips rather than vegetable salad, the organism will be impaired by Change the verb form
prefers
toxic
amount of fats which will impact Add an article
the toxic
on
his health condition profoundly.
In conclusion, there exist several strong rationales which play an essential role Change preposition
apply
to address
the issue of obesity and other diseases among youngsters. Even though it is Change preposition
in addressing
fact
, that the government should apply different methods Correct article usage
a fact
Correct quantifier usage
such as
as
engaging in physical fitness, in my point of view every kid Change preposition
of
either
their family are responsible Correct word choice
and
to
Change preposition
for
take
Verb problem
making
fundamental
shift in Add an article
a fundamental
life
Change noun form
life's
behavior
to prevent from overweight and illnesses.Change the spelling
behaviour
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!