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Band 4

In the future, robots will do more and more jobs instead of humans. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

#future #robots #jobs #humans #development
An increasing number of
people
 are leaving their corporate jobs to work for themselves.
This
 choice has a number of benefits and drawbacks, which will be discussed in
this
 essay. The biggest and most significant benefit that comes with self-employment is flexibility. One can decide when to set the working hours and holidays. Flexibility
also
 means freedom in the work environment. A lot of
people
 are able to travel at the same time and accomplish tasks flexibly through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computers anywhere.
Apart from
this
, there’s
no-one
Correct your spelling
no one
show examples
 to report to or justify your every action and decision. A person becomes
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
his
her
show examples
 own boss. The income can increase dramatically
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 since it is possible to set the prices and choose clients
as well as
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of projects independently. All of these things would not be possible in a stable corporate office job,
thus
 making more and more
people
 leave their jobs and pursue freelancing.
Although
 there are amazing benefits that come with self-employment, the drawbacks should not be ignored. With freedom, comes the great responsibility for all the actions. Because one is
its
Change the word
the
show examples
 only employee, it can be at times stressful and exhausting to deal with all the projects alone.
Big
Add an article
The big
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 difference is
also
 in economic stability. Since there is no stable income, the quality of life can possibly decrease dramatically for a person.
Apart from
this
, there are no social benefits or health
insurances
Fix the agreement mistake
insurance
show examples
, which were automatically secured in the office.
However
, I’ve seen a lot of
people
 succeed
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
earn even more money and increase their quality of life significantly when starting their own business. Everything
that is
 required is patience and time.
Submitted by katja.otavina on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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