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Band 4.5

Pollution and other environmental damage are caused by a country developing and becoming richer. This problem cannot be avoided. To what extent do you agree?.

#pollution #damage #country
Nowadays, one of the widely discussed and important topics is environmental issues
such
 as
pollution
 and
climat
Correct your spelling
climate
 change. Some people believe that it has
occured
Correct your spelling
occurred
due to
material
Correct article usage
the material
show examples
 and wealth growth of
countries
, and it has no solution. I completely disagree with
this
 statement, because it is possible to prevent
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 damage by negotiating with
countries
 which
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 great influence and finding a solution.
To begin
, there are plenty of
countries
 that are the main
sourse
Correct your spelling
source
 of some vital fossil fuels or minerals. By manufacturing these kind of materials, they are causing
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
land and ocean
pollution
 that are
also
 affecting many species.
However
, apart from developing
countries
Add a comma
countries,
show examples
 there are some reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 damaging
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
For example
, citizens of poor
countries
 don't own private
bin
Fix the agreement mistake
bins
show examples
 or don't have
educatonal
Correct your spelling
educational
 lessons like where
litters
Fix the agreement mistake
litter
show examples
 can be tossed.
Consequently
, they are spreading rubbish around them and increasing
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 of distributed waste.
Secondly
, we can avoid
pollution
 disasters
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
 just a few straightforward rules. If people commence
throw
Wrong verb form
throwing
show examples
 out the trash to the special bins and collect
spreaded
Correct your spelling
spread
show examples
 waste in
surroundings
Correct article usage
the surroundings
show examples
, we
are
Wrong verb form
will be
show examples
 able to the win fight against
nature
Replace the word
natural
show examples
 damage.
Furthermore
, scientists are trying to discover new ideas
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 to solve environmental problems and there are several successful inventions.
For instance
, scientists say that if we reduce
production
Add an article
the production
show examples
 of carbon dioxide, it is possible to overcome
climat
Correct your spelling
climate
 change. In conclusion, all aforementioned points illustrate that
runner
Replace the word
running
show examples
countries
 in
developing
Correct article usage
a developing
show examples
 process
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
 impact on nature
pollution
, but there are more crucial measures that we have to embrace for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
 of the world.
Submitted by ieltssat8 on

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coherence cohesion
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction.
task achievement
Expand on the reasons why developing countries contribute to environmental damage.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.

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