Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you sugi

#gyms #lifestyle #popularity #world #sugi

It is common knowledge that we can find many sports

centers

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centres

show examples

in a city, but we cannot deny that many

people

are experiencing sedentary lifestyles. There are some issues which are affected by sedentary lifestyles and some possible solutions to overcome the problems. It is generally known that less activity can bring a negative side to our

health

This

is because we tend to sit down for many hours and

less

Add a missing verb

have less

show examples

movement. One problem related to our

health

is that

high

Change preposition

in high

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pressure, our blood does not move well in our body when we do not do any activities. To tackle

this

problem,

people

should use one spare

time

to do sport in a week and they are encouraged to consume a healthy diet, and drink enough mineral water. In

this

way, society will be avoided by gaining high blood pressure. Despite

health

issues,

people

spend their

time

unproductively.

This

is because they use their

time

to watch TV. Sometimes they sleep over

time

in a day which should be used to do something beneficial for them, and probably benefit other

people

. A solution is for

the

Correct article usage

apply

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people

to join several clubs like sports and volunteering

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apply

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so that they can

bring

Verb problem

have

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positive

Correct article usage

a positive

show examples

impact

for

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themselves and for

people

around them.

Furthermore

people

are isolated in spite of communicating with

people

around them.So joining a club is an absolute way to avoid sedentary lifestyles. All in all, it is not allowed to spend our

time

in an unproductive way because it will lead to several negative impacts to our life like

health

issues and isolation. So it is highly important to do productive activities to support our life.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Mon Oct 09 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion in your essay.

coherence cohesion

Use linking words and phrases to improve the coherence of your essay.

lexical resource

Improve the accuracy and variety of your vocabulary.

grammatical range and accuracy

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you sugi

Fully explain your ideas

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicle will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

More and more people in developing countries are purchasing cars for the first time. What problems does this cause? What do you think is a possible solution?

Many people believe that women make better parents than men and that is why they have the greater role in raising children in most societies. Others claim that men are just as good as women at parenting.

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both these views.

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.