Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a nagative development?

The amount of screen
time
of
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by
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children
is concerning many adults, since most of the hours of the day are spent on
smartphones
.
This
essay will discuss some of the reasons why
this
might be the case and present arguments, why, in my opinion,
this
is a negative development. The core of the problem
lays down to
Verb problem
lies in
show examples
parenting. I have seen numerous amount of times, when a child is given a gadget from an earlier age to calm down or as an option to spend
time
.
This
way a child learns that
everytime
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every time
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he gets upset, he is given a smartphone to play.
Furthermore
, an addiction can be easily
developt
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developed
show examples
and in the
future
Add a comma
future,
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it will be hard for a person to stay away from his electronic device. Another reason might be social media, where most of the
children
's and
teenager's
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers'
show examples
communication happens. The temptation
as well as
the fear of missing something out is high, which leads to endless scrolling that increases the screen
time
a lot. When
children
play, they develop crucial social skills and creativity that are important for their
future
.
However
, the increased usage of
smartphones
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
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on
Change preposition
apply
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the quality of communication, since most of the messages sent are short and meaningless.
Besides
that,
children
through
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over
show examples
time
will lack concentration, since their attention span will get shorter.
This
might in the
future
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
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negatively their academic success.
Therefore
, I believe,
children
's increased
time
spent on
smartphones
, is
definetely
Correct your spelling
definitely
a negative development that
effects
Correct your spelling
affects
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their life in
a
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the
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long run.
To conclude
,
children
's usage of
smartphones
depends on the way they have been raised
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
at home. Most are offered gadgets to deal with hard feelings from an earlier age, resulting in concentration problems in the
future
.
Submitted by katja.otavina on

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coherence cohesion
Include a thesis statement in the introduction to clearly state your opinion.
task achievement
Support your arguments with more specific examples or evidence.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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