Some people say that arts subjects such as painting or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some people believe that
arts related
Add a hyphen
arts-related
subjects
should be additional, not involved to
Change preposition
in to
cirruculum
as a necessary subject in high schools. I totally agree with that opinion because Correct your spelling
curriculum
arts
need some additional skills
and some students
want to build their carreer
in Correct your spelling
career
different
direction.
Add an article
a different
Arts
way of the exprees
feelings and Correct your spelling
express
this
is only possible with
Change preposition
in
free
environment. Correct article usage
a free
Furthermore
, the human brain can not be creative, which is main
driving factor of made art, when it is under pressure. For that Add an article
the main
a main
reasons
, Fix the agreement mistake
reason
made
Wrong verb form
making
arts
classes compulsory for the
high school Correct article usage
apply
students
do
not bring success in that field. Correct subject-verb agreement
does
Also
, these subjects
require some skills
, such
as having a good graphical memory or drawing skills
, while
some people born
with these Add a missing verb
are born
skills
, others do not. This
situation brings un-equality
among Correct your spelling
inequality
students
because some of them will fail in exams that lower students
' grades which is important for entrance in
the university. Change preposition
into
Moreover
, this
will effect
their early career before beginning Correct your spelling
affect
to
Change preposition
apply
proffessional
life.
Correct your spelling
professional
On the other hand
, some students
want to become an engineer or scientist
which is more rely on Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
techinical
Correct your spelling
technical
skills
. These students
can use their time more effectively with
choosing core Change preposition
by
subjects
, such
as maths, biology or physics, that help to boost their technical knowledge. Also
, this
approach improves others' educational journey who wants
to learn the Correct subject-verb agreement
want
arts
subjects
. Because, when students
have a chance to choose their subjects
, some of them will not attend the
art classes. Correct article usage
apply
Furthermore
, this
will end with more effective studying time that they can take instant feedback from their teachers about their drawing or reach more reseources
, Correct your spelling
resources
such
as paints, special drawing papers, and pencils.
In conclusion, involving
Wrong verb form
being involved
to
art classes should Change preposition
in
be depend
on Change the verb form
depend
students
' choose
. In that way, they can build their career path more effectively and bring more Replace the word
choices
succeess
both in Correct your spelling
success
the
high school and Correct article usage
apply
the
higher education.Correct article usage
apply
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task achievement
Make sure to clearly state your position in the introduction.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Use transition words to improve the coherence and flow of your essay.
lexical resource
Consider using more academic vocabulary and varied sentence structures.
grammatical range accuracy
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
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I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.