Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#government #investment #arts #music #theatre #waste #money #governments #services

It is commonly argued that there are more advantages when living in urban

areas

compared to rural

areas

. Personally, I can neither completely agree nor disagree with

this

statement for a variety of reasons. I partly agree that residing in the backcountry has some benefits. One of the main reasons can be that it is close to nature.

Therefore

, life here is peaceful, the density of the population is low, and the people are friendly and supportive.

This

means that residents can enjoy beautiful landscapes with fresh air, grow their own food and have a strong sense of community.

For example

, whenever I feel stressed from work, I will seek relaxation in Lam Dong province, which has a cool climate and stunning natural scenery. Taking a break there can help me recharge and feel energized for the days ahead.

On the other hand

, I agree with the viewpoint that dwelling in metropolises has more advantages than in rural regions.

Firstly

, it provides access to a wide range of job opportunities, educational institutions, healthcare systems and entertainment options.

This

is because cities are often the hub of business activities, so many people are drawn to town to pursue career chances, educational environments for their children and access to various amenities

as well as

services.

For example

according to

Vietnamworks

Correct your spelling

Vietnam works

, the job opportunities in Ho Chi Minh City, a bustling metropolis of Vietnam, are hundreds of times higher than in Tay Ninh, a province near the Vietnam – Cambodia border. In conclusion,

although

it is believed that living in urban

areas

offers more conveniences than inhabiting rural

areas

, I’m convinced that both have their own unique benefits and it depends on the individual’s need to decide where is more suitable for each person.

Submitted by yeshomeclass on Mon Oct 09 2023

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Task Response

Your essay, while structured with an introduction, two main paragraphs, and a conclusion, presents a mix of ideas that somewhat deviate from the core topic posed by the prompt. This has led to a score of 6/9 in coherence and cohesion and 5/9 in task achievement due to the off-topic nature of the essay, which was supposed to address the prospects of government investment in the arts versus public services, not the comparison between urban and rural living.

Coherence and Cohesion

To improve your score in coherence and cohesion, focus on clearly connecting your ideas and paragraphs with transition words and phrases that reflect the progression of your argument. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it support that main idea. In this essay, make sure that the provided examples align with the topic in question - government investment priorities.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

cultural enrichment
expression of creativity
promote diversity
enhance social cohesion
boost tourism
job creation
stimulate economic growth
improve quality of life
essential services
maintenance and development

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Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population create problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extant do the advantage of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?.

3. Can money bring happiness? Give your opinion and support it with examples

Students generally prefer to choose the period they are supposed to study and the period they are free to have fun. They should be allowed to do their time management. Do you agree or disagree

Nowadays, there are a large number of coffee shops and fast-food vendors on high streets and in town centres. Why are there so many of these outlets? What effect is this having on the society?

Many people believe that the current system of both teachers and students in the classroom will no longer exist by the year 2050. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?