Some people think that it's a good idea to socialise with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it's important to keep working life completely seperate from social life.

Nowadays, individuals believe that socializing with workplace friends benefits you and some folk prefer to separate jobs and personal
life
.
However
,
my
Change preposition
in my
show examples
opinion, it is good to have
keep to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
separate jobs and personal
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
This
essay will discuss both views and
while giving
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
reasons for my opinion
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in forthcoming paragraphs.
To begin
, when
take
Wrong verb form
taken
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in to
Correct your spelling
into
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account,
keep
Wrong verb form
keeping
show examples
strong
Add an article
a strong
show examples
relationship with colleagues
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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many benefits.
For instance
, The latest analysis done by
oxford university
Correct your spelling
Oxford University
show examples
has
recognize
Wrong verb form
recognised
show examples
,
Correct word choice
that, who
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who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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have strong
get
Correct your spelling
get-togethers
together with
office members are at
all-time
Correct article usage
an all-time
show examples
achieved their task at on- time,
nevertheless
,
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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lack
of
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apply
show examples
connections with co-workers are always not performed.
Thus
,
have
Wrong verb form
having
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positive
friendship
Fix the agreement mistake
friendships
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with staff,
besides
, these physical advantages, the confidential level human able to grow.
On the other hand
, some
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
believe good to have
keep
Verb problem
apply
show examples
separate jobs and personal
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. I would say I totally agree with
this
concept. Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
having
relaxation
Replace the word
a relaxed
show examples
mind and
physically
Change the word
physical
show examples
.
For instance
, In my experience, My father has
big
Add an article
a big
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business in
sri-lanka
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Sri Lanka
show examples
,
although
he always said do not want to mix my business and family
life
and all the time keep separate
therefore
, my first priority
my
Add a missing verb
is my
show examples
wife and children.
However
,
as a
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
I saw always my father
stay
Verb problem
live
show examples
in happy
life
.
Furthermore
, I
also
believe my
father
Change noun form
father's
show examples
concept.
Likewise
, do not want to worry about the workstation matter when we go
outsides
Replace the word
outside
show examples
.
To conclude
, when discussing both points of view,
first
Add an article
the first
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point is bringing to
successful
Correct article usage
a successful
show examples
working
life
also
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
point
build-up
Correct your spelling
is building
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good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
family
life
.
Furthermore
,
this
my
Add a missing verb
is my
show examples
opinion as the same second points
Submitted by himalhi.deepthi on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction.
Task Achievement
Expand on your main points and provide additional examples to support your opinion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Use appropriate punctuation and grammar.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay into paragraphs to improve readability.
Lexical Resource
Use more precise vocabulary and avoid repetitive phrases.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • foster
  • supportive work environment
  • personal growth
  • diverse perspectives
  • conflicts of interest
  • professional boundaries
  • work-life balance
  • burnout
  • innovation
  • collaborative projects
  • hierarchy
  • authority
  • nuanced decision
  • social and cultural expectations
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