25.Scientists and tourists can travel to remote natural environment such as the South Pole. Do you think the advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is said that scientists and travellers can visit
far away
Add a hyphen
far-away
show examples
natural
territory
Fix the agreement mistake
territories
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
essay would argue that despite
people
Use synonyms
enjoy
Wrong verb form
enjoying
show examples
new
places
Use synonyms
, some individuals will damage
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
,
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
means that the advantages do not outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, when
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
visit new
places
Use synonyms
,
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
different landscapes that they cannot see in their own cities, they will relax and enjoy more.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
this
Linking Words
will make them
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more interested in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and want to travel around similar
places
Use synonyms
in the future. In some way,
this
Linking Words
will allow
people
Use synonyms
to know that natural habitats are decreasing, so they can understand how valuable are, so they need to be protected.
For example
Linking Words
, Spanish
people
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
of going out with their friends in the town,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
prefer travelling to
natural
Correct article usage
a natural
show examples
environment because the air is fresher and it is more comfortable, so
therefore
Linking Words
it is easier for them to leave the stress of work behind.
However
Linking Words
, I’m of the opinion
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that when
people
Use synonyms
travel to natural
places
Use synonyms
, these regions will be contaminated easily by the rubbish that
people
Use synonyms
throw, so there are too many disadvantages.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, after visiting remote natural
places
Use synonyms
, scientists might opt to do experiments in those regions and
also
Linking Words
since new resources can be found.
As well
Rephrase
Also
show examples
, some
people
Use synonyms
will think that
are
Correct pronoun usage
these are
show examples
good locations to develop, changing all the natural
places
Use synonyms
to industrial areas, helping them to increase their
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
situation. But all
Linking Words
this
Change the determiner
these
show examples
activities will damage the
envrionment
Correct your spelling
environment
, leading to higher global warming and contamination.
For instance
Linking Words
, lots of forests are cut down because they are used for creating products that
humans’
Change noun form
humans
show examples
need, but
this
Linking Words
causes
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
some animals
lost
Change the verb form
to lose
show examples
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
living place, and
also
Linking Words
it results in a higher amount of carbon dioxide and
lower
Correct article usage
a lower
show examples
amount of oxygen, and
people
Use synonyms
need oxygen to live, so without trees,
people
Use synonyms
’s live can be in danger.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I would argue that
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
show examples
of travelling to natural territory are more significant than the benefits. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
can have a good time in areas distant from the cities, they can pollute and destroy those
places
Use synonyms
too, for these reasons, the negatives far outnumber the positives.
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: