IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Nowadays, people spend too much time at work to the extent that they hardly have any time for their personal life. How widespread is the problem and what are the consequences.

#people #time #work #life #consequences
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In
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent
Use synonyms
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
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, ones may dedicate a lot of
time
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at
Change preposition
to
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 work,
consequently
Linking Words
, they may have less
time
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 for their own personal
life
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.
This
Linking Words
 is
widespread
Add an article
a widespread
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 phenomenon which may have devastating
repereceous
Correct your spelling
repercussions
 in our relationships. As a parent who is responsible for children's economic
life
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, there would be a lot of stress in order to ensure a respectful
life
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 for every member
in
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of
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 the family. That would demand you to work for not little
time
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.
In
Change preposition
On
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 the one hand, trying to improve the quality of
life
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 as much as possible and
on the other hand
Linking Words
, the
time
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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left for your own family doesn't enough. The
time
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 we spend with near relations is a gold
time
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.
That is
Linking Words
 the
time
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 we can escape from stressful issues we have to deal with in our daily
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
And
Correct word choice
This
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this
Linking Words
time
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 is critical for our psychological health. One must have
time
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 to clean his/her mind and feel there is a goal to achieve by working hard. In conclusion, we must try to find
the
Correct article usage
a
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 balance between these goals.
First,
Linking Words
workin
Correct your spelling
working
- in order to feel
will
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well
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 with your
aceivments
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achievements
 and contributing
for
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to
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 society and your own economic strength and second to have the "escape
time
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" for all your close circle wellbeing.
Submitted by leenaasalee on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • workaholic
  • work-life balance
  • stress
  • burnout
  • strain
  • personal relationships
  • family life
  • physical health
  • sleep deprivation
  • lack of exercise
  • productivity
  • creativity
  • self-care
  • personal fulfillment
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