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Has the importance of travel by water changed now from how it was in the past? Discuss these views and provide your opinion.

#importance #travel #water
Nowadays, in
this
 generation, all kinds of
transportation
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 improved by technological advancement. In the past,
travel
 by
water
 was the main form of
transportation
 used to move
people
 and goods.
However
, now it has changed to better conditions
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
 and cars. I would like to discuss both views in the following paragraphs.     
Firstly
, in the
past
Add a comma
past,
show examples
 the only way to
travel
 was by
water
 using boats.
Moreover
, there were many
people
 who passed away,
while
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by
water
, because it was really dangerous to
travel
 by
water
.
For instance
, traveling via small wooden boats may not endure the turbulence of the waves, storms,
high
Correct word choice
and high
show examples
 passenger loads and it cause deaths, drowning,
conflicts
Correct word choice
and conflicts
show examples
 from the poor nutrition and cramped living conditions on the ships.
In addition
, a number of folks
also
 got lost in the middle of the sea because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 many
people
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 overboard during big storms and less safety measures.
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, the food often ran short because the journeys were longer than anticipated,
thus
people
 died of starvation or developed serious illnesses caused by poor or a lack of nutrition. Even though
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by
water
 took a long time, perhaps
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
days, weeks or months.  
On the other hand
, now the number of
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 by
water
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 much less than in the past. But, if
people
 want to
travel
 by
water
 they can use the modern electrical boat with all kinds of safety, which reduces the number of deaths.
However
, now the more popular
travel
transportation
 mode is
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because the time taken for
travel
 is substantially reduced.
People
 can now
travel
 from Saudi to England in six hours by
plan
Correct your spelling
plane
show examples
 rather than spending months to reach their destination by ship.
Airplanes
Change the spelling
Aeroplanes
show examples
 can
travel
 above the seas without any limited danger for the
people
.   In conclusion, in my opinion,
people
 are avoiding
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by
water
 more now than
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in the past, whilst presently
airplanes
Change the spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
 are the most important mode of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
transportation
 for most
people
.
Submitted by hamoudisayyah on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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