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Writing Samples /
Band 1

There are those who claim that big cities are much suitable places for adolescence to live in. Do you agree or disagree?

#cities #places #adolescence
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 disagree because big
cities
 are mostly where big and tall buildings are built to provide
Add an article
a work
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work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
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 for adults with different personalities. I
also
 believe that big
cities
 are mostly stuffed with high
rate
Fix the agreement mistake
rates
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 of mobility and it will make them think
like
Change preposition
that
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 time changes rapidly, which eventually will affect their mental health. In my country, big
cities
 are the centre of activity, industry, and all that honestly can cause the environment to be harmful
for
Change the preposition
to
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 people who are still growing up.
High
Correct article usage
A high
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 rate of transportation mobility leads to bad air quality, especially if the city is not providing any prevention forms for that. I think
adolescences
Replace the word
adolescents
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 will fit more to live outside big
cities
 and look out for more environment that helps them to grow healthily.
Submitted by periset on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • adolescence
  • suitable
  • advantages
  • educational opportunities
  • cultural experiences
  • recreational activities
  • healthcare facilities
  • networking
  • career opportunities
  • disadvantages
  • cost of living
  • competition
  • pressure
  • close-knit communities
  • pollution
  • environmental issues
  • safety concerns
  • conclusion
What to do next:
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