Some people say that schools should teach good behavior to children and introduce them to right and wrong. Parents should not only be the ones responsible. To what extent do you agree or disagree.
The role of
school
and family in educating children
has long been a topic of debates
. Some believe that only teachers should teach and introduce youngsters to good Fix the agreement mistake
debate
behaviors
, Change the spelling
behaviours
while
other
do not. Considering the above Fix the agreement mistake
others
arguement
, I strongly advocate that teaching the young Correct your spelling
argument
require
both Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
parents
and Change noun form
parent's
parents'
teachers
efforts.
On one hand, the involvement of both family and academy brings effectiveness in educating teenagers. Change noun form
teachers'
teacher's
Children
's performances not only can be observed and regulated at school
by educator
but Fix the agreement mistake
educators
also
at home
by parents
, which might be
easier to monitor and adapt different training Verb problem
make it
method
that Fix the agreement mistake
methods
suitable
for offspring. Add a missing verb
are suitable
Moreover
, the cooperation between home
and school
might bring comprehensive
environment for the development of descendants. The students can be taught skills and Correct article usage
a comprehensive
well
behaviors at Correct word choice
apply
school
as well as
at home
, where parents
can closely follow and tutor them whenever they need helps
, especially in the early stage of Correct subject-verb agreement
help
children
.
On the other hand
, the coordination of home
environment might Correct article usage
the home
bring
Verb problem
have
long-term
influence on the child. Correct article usage
a long-term
Family
is the one who Correct article usage
The family
follow
and Change the verb form
follows
be
side Unnecessary verb
apply
with
people's life from Change preposition
of
newborn
to Correct article usage
the newborn
adult
stage, Add an article
the adult
which
with that amount of time, Correct word choice
and
individual
can Add an article
an individual
the individual
observes
and mimics Change the verb form
observe
Correct pronoun usage
their parent's
parent's
performances in order to adapt to their attitude.Fix the agreement mistake
parents'
Furthermore
, family might have more impacts
on Fix the agreement mistake
impact
children
as they tend to spend more time at home
rather than at school
, which might be affect
their thoughts and actions, so that family might Change the verb form
affect
also
be responsible for educating teenagers to
right and wrong in life.
To recapitulate, the development of a child Change preposition
about
need
the family and academic surroundings as they Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
both
crucial. Add a missing verb
are both
Parents
and teacher
should together cultivate Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
youngsters
Change noun form
youngsters'
youngster's
behaviors
in order to ensure they are on the right path because they will be soon the leaders of the country.Change the spelling
behaviours
Submitted by linhphuong2110 on
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coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks clarity and does not clearly state the writer's opinion on the topic. Ensure that the introduction clearly states the viewpoint you will be supporting.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear structure with identifiable paragraphs. Make sure to organize your ideas into paragraphs to improve coherence and readability.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your ideas. This will improve the relevance and strength of your arguments.
grammatical range accuracy
Check your use of grammar and sentence structures. There are several errors throughout the essay that affect clarity and coherence.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary and use a wider range of language to express your ideas. This will enhance the lexical resource of your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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