IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph illustrates the population of three counties, Columbia, Yamhill and Washington state of Oregon which increased over 60 years, between 1940 and 2000. Washington has the highest population of three counties in 60 years

The line graph illustrates the population of three counties, Columbia, Yamhill and Washington state of Oregon which increased over 60 years, between 1940 and 2000. Washington has the highest population of three counties in 60 years
#line #population #three #counties #columbia #yamhill #washington #oregon #years
The line graph illustrates the
population
 of three
counties
, Columbia, Yamhill and Washington state of Oregon which increased over 60
years
, between 1940 and 2000. Washington has the highest
population
 of three
counties
 in 60
years
.
Overall
, amount of people in all of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
counties
get
Correct subject-verb agreement
gets
show examples
 larger and
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
 brilliant results
however
 each
counties
Change to a singular noun
county
show examples
 has an individual indicator
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every single year. By 1970, at the start of the period, Washington`s
population
 had grown from 75,000 to 120,000.
Moreover
, by 2000,
this
growing
Wrong verb form
grew
show examples
 dramatically to about twice as much 240,000. It is in fact like increasing to 200%. From 1970 to 2000, in 30
years
 it is the peaked result. The lowest
population
 is in Columbia, in 2000 their difference with Washington is approximately 165,000. In every year Washington`s
population
 was more than twice
than
Correct word choice
that
show examples
Columbia`s
Change preposition
of Columbia`s
show examples
.
The
Change preposition
In the
show examples
years
 between 1940 and 1970 the populations of Yamhill and Columbia
moves
Wrong verb form
moved
show examples
 slightly up
then
 to 2000 it
rises
Wrong verb form
rose
show examples
 exactly the same 45,000.
On the other hand
, it is
furthermore
similarly
Change the word
similar
show examples
as
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
rise
Change the verb form
rising
show examples
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
Washington`s index.
Submitted by dnm.best on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, counties, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "illustrates" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rises" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: