Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situationsuch as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#people #situationsuch #job #shortage #money #situations

I discovered there are two viewpoints in the question passage. The first one is to embrace the pain and failure of being impoverished and a terrible job. The second view believed that it is better to try and improve the situation. I will begin by breaking down the root cause which is some

people

feeling disenchanted with their jobs.

This

can happen because they can not meet their objective. When the objective is not achieved,

this

can result in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

disastrous performance which can give

people

a red mark on the KPI report. We all know that companies pay their employee based on their performance. As for the result of

this

root cause the second reason, is a shortage of money. Why do

people

need to accept their circumstances? There are many reasons to answer

this

question. First of all,

people

need to accept their destiny in order to see

things

unbiased. We need to think about a horrendous problem with a cool mind. After we swallow the pain

first,

we can get to know what are we faced with.

People

need to list down how they feel, it is better if they can list down the pain points. We have to ascertain that we already realize there are

things

that need to be mended. In the end,

people

will learn many

things

in order to not repeat the same mistake. But the most important note for ourselves is to prioritise ourselves. Other

things

can wait. In my humble opinion, it is a must to accept our situation no matter how horrible is . But for the second view, it can done depending on our situation. We are the ones who know what is best for ourselves.

Submitted by semangatbanget.s2 on Thu Oct 12 2023

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coherence cohesion

Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction that clearly addresses the two views and your opinion.

coherence cohesion

Expand on your arguments and provide more specific examples to support your points.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph.

grammatical range accuracy

Improve sentence structure and grammar to enhance clarity and coherence.

lexical resource

Use more varied vocabulary to improve lexical resource.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situationsuch as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

n increaring number of professionals, such as doctors and scientists, are leaving their poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What Solutions can you suggest this situation?

Digital Communication Technology, such as emails, instant messaging and social media, has improved communication and connections between people. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for you answer and include examples.

Some people think it is important to spend time in developing a successful career while others think it is more importany to spend time with family and friends. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

With the advent of social media, more people are getting their news online instead of from print media. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for people who read news online.