IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, make comparisons where relevant.
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The given line graph gives information about the rate of closed and recently opened
shops
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a country from 2011 to 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is a downward trend of
shops
Use synonyms
 for both closures and openings. The
number
Use synonyms
 of closed and opened
shops
Use synonyms
 reached about
same
Change the article
the same
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 point
at
Change preposition
in
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 2014.
Then
Linking Words
 the rate of new
shops
Use synonyms
 decreased gradually between 2014 and 2018,
whereas
Linking Words
 closed
shops
Use synonyms
number
Use synonyms
 started to increase dramatically from 2015 to 2018. With more details, the
number
Use synonyms
 of closed and opened
shops
Use synonyms
 decreased from 2011 to 2012. They both suddenly increased until 2014. There was a dramatic decrease
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of shop
clousures
Correct your spelling
closures
 from 2014 to 2015. Closed
shops
Use synonyms
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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experienced something
badly
Change the word
bad
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 from 2015 to 2016,
Linking Words
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 the rate of shop openings
did
Verb problem
was
show examples
 not affected too much from something and went on a decrease.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail landscape
  • net growth
  • market dynamics
  • economic indicators
  • fluctuations
  • pivotal
  • consumption patterns
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar
  • downward/upward trend
  • stabilize
  • recession
  • boom
  • retail sector
  • closure rate
  • inauguration/opening rate
  • consumer market
  • saturate
  • commercial viability
  • profitability
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