IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries

the graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries
#information #water #consumption #two #countries
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The line chart illustrates
global
Correct article usage
the global
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 expenditure
of
Change preposition
on
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water
Use synonyms
 in three sections from 1900 to 2000,
whereas
Linking Words
 the table compares
water
Use synonyms
 use in Brazil and
Correct article usage
the Demratic
show examples
Demratic
Correct your spelling
Democratic
 Republic of Congo.
Overall
Linking Words
, the vast majority of
water
Use synonyms
 was used in agriculture, whilst domestic expense was the lowest in the three sectors. The
water
Use synonyms
 consumption in Brazil was superior to that in
Correct article usage
the
show examples
Demratic
Correct your spelling
Democratic
 Republic of Congo.
According to
Linking Words
 the information shown in the line graph, agriculture relied on
water
Use synonyms
 the most in the given time which kept increasing from 500km³ to 3000km³.
Besides
Linking Words
, industrial consumption and domestic one had slight gaps until 1950. After a decade, the demand
of
Change preposition
for
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water
Use synonyms
 in industry significantly
raised
Verb problem
increased
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 and reached 1000km³ in 2000. In terms of the data revealed in the table, the population of Brazil in 2000 was 176 million and each person can consume 359 m³ of
water
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while
Linking Words
 the irrigated land was 26500km².
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
water
Use synonyms
distrubution
Correct your spelling
distribution
 per person in
Correct article usage
the Demratic
show examples
Demratic
Correct your spelling
Democratic
 Republic of Congo which had 5.2 million residents in 2000 was 8 m³ and the land of irrigation was 100km².
Submitted by s99104032 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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