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Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

#people #behaviors #age #group #argue #peer #pressure
Some individuals say that
peer
pressure
 creates positive outcomes for children in the same age group,
while
 some people debate that there are drawbacks for young people. In my opinion, I firmly believe
while
 there are disadvantages to these ideas, the advantages are far more significant.
Peer
pressure
 among the groups of
students
 can create positive outcomes for them. First and foremost, that
pressure
 could bring the best version of the
students
. When
students
 compare themselves with each other, they will have the motivation to improve their learning capacity to be better than anyone
.
Rephrase
else.
show examples
Secondly
, the country will be developed by competition among the
students
. As the children desire to be the best one compared to their peers, they will try to study hard, which is the fundamental thing of success. In the future, when these
students
 become adults, they create the most effective way for their work. There are some debates that
this
 kind of
pressure
 might lead to a negative impact on
students
, but it can be mitigated.
For example
, it will cause some stress for
students
 who are unable to follow others.
However
, it can be mitigated by emphasizing the concept of sharing and helping
students
.
As a result
, intelligent
students
 will help their friends to follow them. Another concern is the equality problem might be raised from
this
peer
pressure
 because
students
 who come from the middle class will have more opportunities than
students
 from the lower class.
Nevertheless
, many scholarships are provided in the school.
Therefore
, everyone can engage in the same education as their peers. In conclusion, the advantages of
peer
pressure
 outweigh the disadvantages. Even though there are some drawbacks to the
peer
pressure
 concept, it can be mitigated.
Submitted by nattaporn.vibha on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influence
  • behavior
  • age group
  • peer pressure
  • distinct
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • motivate
  • excel
  • positive behaviors
  • substance abuse
  • bullying
  • risky activities
  • belonging
  • acceptance
  • anxiety
  • stress
  • low self-esteem
  • conform
  • individuality
  • personal growth
  • decision-making skills
  • situations
  • resist
  • healthy balance
  • personal development
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