Despite health warnings, a large number of people continue to smoke all over the world. Why should we be concerned about this? What solutions could you suggest?

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Majority

Correct article usage

The majority

show examples

of masses around the globe keep on smoking regardless of the continuous health

advisory

Fix the agreement mistake

advisories

show examples

being given to

smokers

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay shall delve deeper to discuss the reasons to be concerned about

this

Linking Words

plight and draw some remedies to curb

this

Linking Words

issue.

To begin

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are bothered by

this

Linking Words

unprecedented habit of

Use synonyms

smokers

Replace the word

smoking

show examples

because it is leading society to a dark phase. To elaborate

further

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

smoke

Wrong verb form

smoking

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

public

places

Use synonyms

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

affects

Change the verb form

affect

show examples

others in two ways;

first,

Linking Words

it impacts the health of passive

smokers

Use synonyms

. A report from WHO,

for example

Linking Words

, has revealed that being in the same room or closed environment with

smokers

Use synonyms

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

the risk of lung cancer in

non-

Correct your spelling

non-smokers

show examples

smokers

Use synonyms

by 50% and in

open

Add an article

an open

show examples

environment it increases the risk by 20%.

Hence

Linking Words

, passive smoking can be deadly for all of us.

Second,

Linking Words

it allures others to indulge in the same habit of smoking. As, most of the youngsters start smoking just to look cool by seeing others

Change the verb form

apply

show examples

do so. Moving towards

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

solutions, there are many steps

has

Correct subject-verb agreement

have

show examples

been taken by states

over

Rephrase

all over

show examples

the world to mitigate

this

Linking Words

problem

however

Linking Words

results have not been very progressive.

Albeit

Correct word choice

This

show examples

this

Linking Words

essay shares the same point of view as

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the prime minister of the UK, Rishi Sunak,

that is

Linking Words

to increase

prices

Correct article usage

the prices

show examples

of cigarettes by 1 pound each year and slowly and gradually most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

Use synonyms

would not be able to afford it.

Moreover

Linking Words

, governments have played a hypocrite in

this

Linking Words

matter at

front

Add an article

the front

show examples

they seem to be condemning

this

Linking Words

habit, but they have made smoke

room

Fix the agreement mistake

rooms

show examples

in all the public

places

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as airports, metro stations and many more. So,

government

Add an article

the government

show examples

should take a firm stance and prohibit smoking completely

Change preposition

show examples

public

places

Use synonyms

To conclude

Linking Words

, smoking is hazardous not only for

smokers

Use synonyms

but

also

Linking Words

for

people

Use synonyms

around them and for the coming generations

hence

Linking Words

authority

Fix the agreement mistake

authorities

show examples

must take some strict actions to ban smoking

Change preposition

show examples

public

places

Use synonyms

and raise the prices to make it something out of the league for most

people

Use synonyms

sushainpahwa007Fri Oct 13 2023

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coherence cohesion

Organize your ideas more clearly. Use paragraphs to structure your essay.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your points.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

335 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Addiction
Cardiovascular disease
Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD)
Nicotine
Public health initiative
Secondhand smoke
Substance abuse
Tobacco cessation
Environmental degradation
Social norms
Healthcare burden
Preventive measures

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Despite health warnings, a large number of people continue to smoke all over the world. Why should we be concerned about this? What solutions could you suggest?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvatanges?

In schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts, while boys like science. What are the reasons for this trend and do you think this tendency should be changed? (Problem and Solution)

(2021)News editors decide what to broadcast on television and what to print in newspapers. What factors do you think influence these decisions? Do we become used to bad news? Would it be better if more good news was reported?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to the cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing, Do you think this is a positive or negative development?