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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

the graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.

the graph below shows the number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.
#tourists #caribbean #island
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The line chart
Correct your spelling
illustrating
illutrations
Correct your spelling
illustrates
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
visits
Wrong verb form
visited
show examples
Use synonyms
island
Fix the agreement mistake
islands
show examples
 and
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 between 2010 and 2017
Overall
Linking Words
, the
Use synonyms
people
Correct quantifier usage
number of people
show examples
 who
travels
Change the verb form
travel
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
island
Add an article
the island
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was risen
Change to the active voice
rose
show examples
 between 2012 and 2019
while
Linking Words
 higher than
Use synonyms
cruise
Change preposition
on cruise
show examples
ships
Use synonyms
 in 2016.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 staying on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
was remained
Change to the active voice
remained
show examples
 between 2013 and 2015.
However
Linking Words
, since 2010, the
number
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 of
tourists
Use synonyms
was
Verb problem
has
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significant
Change the adjective
significantly
show examples
 increased. In 2012, the
number
Use synonyms
od
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
tourists
Use synonyms
 who
staying
Wrong verb form
stayed
show examples
 on
Use synonyms
island
Add an article
the island
show examples
 was 0.25
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
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, compared to 1.25
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
 who
chouse
Correct your spelling
chose
show examples
staying
Change the verb form
to stay
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 on
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 so there was
substantial
Correct article usage
a substantial
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different
Replace the word
difference
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
 at
this
Linking Words
 time. By 2015, the figure had
stable
Add an article
a stable
show examples
 increase on
islandm
Correct article usage
the islandm
show examples
 after
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
yearm
Correct your spelling
year
years
 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
people
Use synonyms
 who
visits
Wrong verb form
visited
show examples
Use synonyms
island
Correct article usage
the island
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 was more than
cruise
Use synonyms
ships
Use synonyms
 around 1.5
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millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
tourists
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. Since 2013, the
number
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 of
tourists
Use synonyms
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 not changed as much on
cruise
Use synonyms
 chips
umtil
Correct your spelling
until
 2015. After
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 year,
people
Use synonyms
choused
Verb problem
chose
show examples
 that
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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decreased
around
Change preposition
to around
show examples
 1.25
Use synonyms
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
Although
Linking Words
 peoples choused
curise
Correct your spelling
cruise
ships
Use synonyms
 was not increased
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
number
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 of total
tourists
Use synonyms
 was stable rose
until
Rephrase
steadily until
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 the end of the data.
Submitted by chien10955 on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, people, island, cruise, ships, tourists, millions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 6 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • trough
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • steady increase
  • sharp decline
  • seasonal variation
  • cruise ship visitors
  • island stay visitors
  • economic impact
  • environmental impact
  • tourism industry
  • sustainable tourism
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