Mr Ramamurthy a 63 year old is a patient in a medical ward of which you are the charge nurse

#mr #ramamurthy #year #patient #ward #charge #nurse

I am writing to refer Mr Ramamurthy who is requiring continued care and monitoring.now He is set to be discharged into your care. Mr Ramamurthy was admitted with pneumonia on 4 February 2014 following acute shortness of breath, persistent cough and generalized ache.On admission,he

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

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made

Remove the article

apply

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slow progress.he has mobilized with

Correct article usage

a pick

show examples

pick up

Add a hyphen

pick-up

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frame

Add an article

the frame

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and has assisted with ADL eg.showering,dressing etc.He has increased shortness of breath

while

amulate

Correct your spelling

ambulating

.During hospitalization ,he gained weight as per

dietitian

Correct article usage

the dietitian

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. Mr Ramamurthy was a retired school teacher.He

has

Verb problem

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financially independent.He has had a history of osteoarthritis.He has decreased eyesight

due to

cataract

Correct article usage

a cataract

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removed

Change preposition

apply

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26 months ago. I would highly appreciate it

Remove the comma

apply

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if you could arrange

him

Change preposition

for him

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eye checkup. Encourage him to follow good nutrition which includes

increase

Wrong verb form

increased

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fluid, fruit and vegetables.Please make sure that he is performing chest physio by deep breathing

exercise

Fix the agreement mistake

exercises

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and coughing

exercise

Fix the agreement mistake

exercises

show examples

Submitted by insighttribez on Mon Oct 16 2023

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task achievement

Provide a clear introduction and conclusion to the letter.

task achievement

Include more specific examples and details to support the ideas presented.

lexical resource

Use more appropriate vocabulary and phrasing.

grammatical range accuracy

Ensure sentences are grammatically accurate.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

142 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Mr Ramamurthy a 63 year old is a patient in a medical ward of which you are the charge nurse

Fully explain your ideas

Information technology has significantly transformed our lives in recent years. In your opinion, what is the greatest benefit of information technology? Consider also the disadvantages that the development of this technology may bring about.

Some people believe it is a good idea for students to work part-time to ensure better opportunities in the future. Others are of the opinion, job during study distracts the individual. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that it is possible for a country to be economically successful and have a clean environment. Others argue that these two aims are not compatible. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about culture and people, because people can learn from books, films, or the Internet. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is sometimes said that people should be encouraged to get married before they are 30, as this is best both for the individual and for society. Do you agree or disagree?