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Writing Samples
Band 7

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say this is a positive trend, while others argue that it leads to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and then give your own opinion.

#computers #education #people #trend #consequences #argument
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In recent times, the increasing integration of
computers
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 in
education
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 has sparked a contentious debate. Proponents argue that
this
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 trend holds numerous benefits,
while
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 opponents contend that it can have detrimental effects.
This
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 essay will discuss both perspectives and offer a personal viewpoint. Supporters of using
computers
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 in
education
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 assert that it significantly enhances the learning experience.
Computers
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 provide a vast array of educational resources, making information easily accessible to
students
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.
This
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 wealth of resources can enrich the learning process, exposing
students
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 to various perspectives and fostering a deeper comprehension of the subject matter.
Moreover
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, interactive learning software and online platforms can tailor learning to individual needs, making it more engaging and effective.
Furthermore
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,
computers
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 equip
students
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 with vital
skills
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 for the digital age,
such
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 as proficiency in utilizing software and adapting to evolving technologies. In today's technologically advanced world, these
skills
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 are crucial for future employment prospects.
Therefore
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, integrating
computers
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 into
education
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 is seen as essential for preparing
students
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 for their careers.
However
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, detractors argue that an overreliance on
computers
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 may hinder critical thinking and problem-solving
skills
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. Excessive use of technology could lead to a passive learning approach, where
students
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 become mere consumers of information rather than active learners.
Additionally
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,
the
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unequal access to
computers
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 and the internet exacerbates educational disparities, disadvantaging those without adequate access. In conclusion,
while
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 the use of
computers
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 in
education
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 presents undeniable advantages in terms of accessibility to resources and the development of essential digital
skills
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, a balanced approach is necessary. Educators should promote
a
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judicious use of
computers
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, emphasizing critical thinking and maintaining a balance between technological tools and traditional educational methods.
This
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 ensures that the integration of
computers
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 into
education
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 maximizes benefits
while
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 mitigating potential drawbacks.
Submitted by kokozay on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to support your points.
task achievement
Ensure that your arguments are well-developed and supported.
coherence cohesion
Use transition words and phrases to improve the coherence and cohesion of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Be mindful of sentence structure and grammar.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary to enhance the lexical resource of your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Review the proper use of punctuation marks.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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