IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

in a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these vlews and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport #vlews
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Citizens of some countries consider it should spend a large number of money on building
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
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railways
Use synonyms
 between
cities
Use synonyms
,
Correct word choice
while other
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other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
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 think the money should
spend
Wrong verb form
be spent
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 on improving the existing public transportation systems. Some may say the
high speed
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high-speed
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rail
Correct your spelling
railway
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way
Use synonyms
 is the most efficient
way
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 to get to another city, some
says
Change the verb form
say
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 it is too costly. To start with,
Correct article usage
the high
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high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
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rail
Correct your spelling
railway
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way
Use synonyms
 is the best option for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 between
cities
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
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certain
Correct article usage
a certain
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distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
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. The older public transportation options like
bus
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buses
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 or
normal speed
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normal-speed
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railways
Use synonyms
 are relatively low
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to the high-speed
railways
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, by the
high speed
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high-speed
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rail
Correct your spelling
railway
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way
Use synonyms
,
people
Use synonyms
 can travel between
cities
Use synonyms
 more efficiently.
Second,
Linking Words
with a new option for
people
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 to travel around, fewer
people
Use synonyms
 will choose to drive their own car for longer
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
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,
this
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 may help
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduce
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 the carbon dioxide that emits
to
Change preposition
into
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 the air
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and eventually slows the speed of global warming.
However
Linking Words
, building
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
railway
Use synonyms
 for
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
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 trains is very costly
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to improving existing public transportation options. The cost of building
Correct article usage
a high
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high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
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railway
Use synonyms
 may not
paid
Wrong verb form
pay
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 off, so it may make government waste money on
this
Linking Words
 expensive project of building a
high speed
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high-speed
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railway
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
high speed
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high-speed
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railway
Use synonyms
 may not
as
Add a missing verb
be as
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convenience
Replace the word
convenient
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 as
people
Use synonyms
 expected. In some
cities
Use synonyms
, it is hard to find a perfect area to build a new train station, so the new
railway
Use synonyms
 system will become
inconvenience
Replace the word
inconvenient
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.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
high speed
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high-speed
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railways
Use synonyms
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 a faster
way
Use synonyms
 to travel between
cities
Use synonyms
, and it is good for
slow
Wrong verb form
slowing
show examples
 down the speed of global warming.
However
Linking Words
, it is very costly, and sometimes hard to find a suitable place to build a new train station for it. In my opinion, I think building a new
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
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railway
Use synonyms
 system is a better option.
Submitted by papaya on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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