The chart below shows what anthropology graduates from on university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologists in work after five yeas.

The chart below shows what anthropology graduates from on university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologists in work after five yeas.
The pie chart gives information about the destination of anthropology
graduates
from one university
as well as
their salaries after five years of working.
Overall
, more than half of the
graduates
landed on
a full-time
Remove the article
full-time work
a full-time job
show examples
work
, followed by part-time workers and those who are still unemployed after graduating. Meanwhile, most of the anthropology
graduates
who
works
Change the verb form
work
show examples
as freelance consultants and government employees have their salaries ranging from $75,000 to $100,000+.
Firstly
, a lot of students who graduated with an anthropology degree acquired a full-time job, with an average of 52% of the total.
This
was followed by those who have part-time
work
and unemployed
graduates
, with around 15% and 12%, respectively.
On the other hand
, those who pursued their study with
part time
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
work
have the lowest percentage of all, which only have 5% of the whole. After their five years of
work
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
freelance consultants and those who are in
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
sector are receiving wages that
ranges
Change the verb form
range
show examples
from $75,000 to $100,000+, respectively. Employees of private companies' salaries are juggling around $50,000 to $100,000+, which was illustrated from 25% to 35% rate.
Lastly
, after five years working in three sectors who
receives
Correct subject-verb agreement
receive
show examples
wages from $25,000-$49,000 did not go over 10%.
Submitted by mjdf0930 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words graduates, work with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • anthropology graduates
  • undergraduate degree course
  • chart
  • table
  • findings
  • conclusions
  • salary data
  • comparisons
  • summarize
  • opinion
  • suggestions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: